My Journey.

We all know that I'm done with my finals. I might even had mentioned in an earlier post of doing some kind of pictures post regarding my last minute studying efforts.

So, here we are, I got 4 pictures, which is perhaps a lot for me but just small numbers for others. I thought there were way more but then, I might have counted the other not suitable for public pictures as well.

I humbly present to you, those pictures.

This was taken at my grandmother's house, judging by the yellow tablecloth under my books. So, this would be perhaps around Christmas-ish because my parents were away so I had to stay with my grandparents during nighttime. See those little clouds I drew? This is when I feel like I have plenty of time left. I draw the line at colouring in with highlighters or whatsover.

That is my Stochastic book, my pencil case, Polo mints, my calculator and the wire part of my earphones. Why in the world does the library insists to have mustard yellow tables? They're an eyesore. Trust me. I remember the library being hot that day because some people were too stingy to turn on the air conditioning.

I assure you, I was in panic mode for this picture. It was the day before my Risk Modelling exam, a very nerve wrecking day. I also sat for another one that morning so you can just imagine my level of calmness. Below minimum. You can see the cup with my Neslo which is Nescafe(instant coffee) + Milo which is so goood.

*stares at picture*

Ohhh, this is my attempt on solving a Makeham. Well, a topic in my Actuarial Math 2, the last exam. You see, there was a 7 days gap between this and the one before. I had to kick myself in the ass so I'll start studying 4 days beforehand. I remember being oh-so-calm for the first few days before smacking myself for being too calm.

The End.

Ok, okay. That is the end of my studying for this semester. Of course, the first few days after it ended, I felt so restless and wanted to crack open a book to study. Did I?

Nope. I'm not that bad.

Confession No.27

When anyone ask me how I feel/think, I aim to throw my head back with a laugh and say these words.

"I don't give a fuck."

Session One.

What is your favorite flower?

What I definitely don't like is roses. Red and orange ones especially. They're just that overated. To answer this, I like carnations. Or gardenias. White or light pink. But if a guy gives me flowers then tell me the meaning behind those flowers, I'll swoon and get on one knee before handing them a spider flower.

Are you an organized person?

Does the egg comes before the chicken?

Yes, I'm unsure about that. I don't have checklists. Or studying schedules. I'm a messy person but god forbids when someone suddenly texts me and tells me we have to do so-and-so. I hate the feeling when someone just dump things on my shoulders. I get snappy, I get moody. Does that mean I'm organised in some way where I hate it when people mess with my schedule?

Oh oh, I hate it when things are hastily planned. I believe in knowing things beforehand. Some might say I'm not organised by how I deliberately don't follow schedules I made. But then, for every finals, I make a mental schedule of what subject to study and when to, which I follow religiously.

So, I'm not even sure if its the egg or the chicken.


If you had to spend a day not using any technology, what would you do?

Define technology please. Does this mean car, electricity and all? Or just television, cable, internet, telephones and computers?

Does it include ovens and fridges?

I guess I'll be rolling around in bed, reading my pile of books, cooking lunch and dinner, play with the kitten before heading to bed. Simple as that. Sounds like a normal day, minus my laptop and the internet.


Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?

I'm hitting 23 in about 6 months. I believe in this concept where guys get wiser as they aged, which in turn make them realise that girls are pretty however they are. I don't think a just legal guy would find me attractive. Of course, the 5 years difference. If I was the younger one in the relationship, I won't mind.

What’s your sign?

I'm a Leo. I'm also a Earth Snake according to the Chinese system. Some people really fit into the description of their sign, but me? I fit half and half.

I'm a romantic. But I don't want to be a leader. Other things, well, I can't remember them that much.

Writing by the Book.

With most writers that have plenty of books in print, there would be this formula. The formula of success. Like, for nearly every periodical romance novel there would be that hard to rein in Duke/Lord and the heroine who's either untamed or just so demure and lovely that said hero falls head over heels for her before he could tie on a fresh cravat.

There would be a villain in the form of a family member or an old enemy who the hero thought were out of the picture. There would be denial of feelings and the heroine would turn up her nose, brush away the tears and tell him to screw it if she's not stubborn enough to insist that yes, he is damn well in love with her.

Then the heroine might just get kidnapped or the hero would face some danger and somehow this would led to a scene of "I've fallen in love with you the moment I saw you across the ballroom." before the much awaited for "His manhood swelled at her delicate beauty." part.

Oh I forgot, that heroine has a high chance of either being past her marrying age due to family obligations, lack of standing or perhaps she was ruined due to the gossips coursing throughout the ton.


Yes. I read enough romance novels to know the basic plot. I'm not ashamed that one of my guilty pleasures are books with scandalous-ish covers.

Do you see the formula here? Its so common, basically part and parcel of writingdom. There are two reactions to such formulas. You either:

a)Find it comforting if you happen to like the writer's style of writing. You'll relish every word, loving how it seems familiar but foreign. You might even feel that the characters are all reincarnations from another book.

For example, Jodi Picoult is one of my favourite authors and she has some kind of formula going on, just not as obvious as those romance novels. Yet, I still love her books.

b) If you don't like the style of writing or you're not easily satisfied, you'll dismiss the writer's books and scoff, saying everything is just the same.

(Now is when I start bashing certain writers which might just bring the hellhounds down on me)

For this exact reason, I'm coming clean by saying that I just don't like Danielle Steel and Nicholas Spark. I've read ... 8-9(at least) books by the former and 3 from the latter and god, I skip most of the pages of Danielle's books and Nicholas'? Well, I know some girls just love his books because they really tug on your heartstrings but I swear, I regret making his The Guardian as one of the books I borrowed from the library.

No, I'm not dissing their writing skills. I just don't like their formulas.

Your taste in books is like your definition of beauty. Its very very subjective.

Confession No.26

I'm fine. I'm confused. I just ... I'm not fine. Not at all. I don't know what to think. I'm fine I'm fine I'm absolutely fine. I'm not. I just want to turn off the lights, lock the door and have Cupid's Fall on repeat until I fall asleep. Or until the battery dies.

Wow. Just Wow.

Wow.

I just finished reading Richard Bachman's The Long Walk. It is actually by Stephen King because Richard Bachman is an alias he used. I read about the book on Wiki about a year-ish ago and it caught my interest because of the general idea.

One hundred boys walk to their death, the last one standing wins. They get ticketed for a list of offenses and once you get 3 tickets, you're a target to be killed by the soldiers. If you manage to walk 3 hours, you lose those tickets. If you fall under the minimum speed or do any of the other offenses, you get shot.

Yes. It sounds ... horrible. I started reading it last night and 206 pages later, I finished reading the last sentence and whispered to myself one word.

Wow.

Some might think its not that interesting because nearly the whole damn book is about those boys walking, and walking. But Stephen King managed to make it so interesting I read about half of the book last night.

I knew how it was going to end, thanks to Wikipedia but it still hit me hard. The end came so abruptly. No explanation. Definitely no happily ever after. I'm awed. I feel like this book has just got itself into that list of Best Books Ever in my head.

If there's a book I wished I've written, apart from the HP series, is this book.

Now, I'm going to find more Richard Bachman's books to read.

Plans of Freedom.

I'm freeeeeeeeeee. Well, my finals are over , I have no class until 4th of March so I plan to read all the books I can get my hands on, work my ass off (if I get the chance to) and perhaps, try to work some fat off said ass?

Today, after leaving the examination hall I headed for the library and borrowed as much books I could carry which is sadly not enough for me. I got 8 books, which I chose within 5 minutes since the fiction section is really small in that particular library. Some are from authors I've heard and read before, some are complete strangers.

I'll tell you more of the books as I read them one by one since I have big big plans for this blog now.

One: I'm going to take you through a trip of my study sessions, there will be pictures (big deal for Hanis since I don't really do pictures before this)

Two: There might be a post of pictures, again, but this time it would be of the food I had over the last few weeks. Nothing fancy or anything but I think the comments with every picture would increase the interest factor.

Three: I got a set of questions which I would answer in about, 4-5 installments but don't think God-this-will-be-uber-boring because it will not. I'll make sure I'll get a Mokesart approval.

Four: Update on my choices of books to buy.

Oh yes, I contacted the bookstore last night, asking them to hold onto a copy of J.R Ward's Lover Unleashed and told them I'll be in this weekend or early next week. I got a reply saying they're holding on to the last copy but then, they're closed starting from today till the end of this month due to Chinese New Year.

*cue crying*

This only means that I'll have more time to choose so that's the silver lining for me.

Updates on Books

J.R Ward's Lover Unleashed is definitely one of them. I'm also going to get a Stephen King, most probably The Shining.

Looking for Alaska by John Green seems to be a pretty good choice. Now, that is all. That leaves 3 more spots.

*gets super excited*

Now, excuse me while I tuck into my cooking shows marathon.

I Need Your Help. Pleaseee.

The government gave every child in school one hundred ringgit in cash around last November. For some political reasons unknown to me. I think its good because perhaps, 30% of the kids would actually use it to buy school uniforms and stationaries, unlike my lil bro who combined it with his savings and bought a pair of Nike shoes.

I joked back then that for university students, they'll be giving out two hundred ringgit. Imagine my surprise when that kinda came true.

*goes to make a joke about her getting together with a certain guy*

Instead of cash, we got a book voucher valued at two hundred ringgit. It is given in 4 coupons, each valued at fifty ringgit. For academic books. To promote the habit of reading.

First of all, who the hell read academic books? *ignore people like Hermione*

I snooped around and guess what? We can use the vouchers to buy fiction novels and stationaries.

*runs around excited*

Then, I found out, I could use them at the wonderful store where most paperbacks are under the offer of "Buy Two, Get One Free". Which totally made me so excited, I started studying for my last exam.*starts to panic about it*

Okay, deep breaths. To get me through the few days, I'm going to make a list of books that I'll buy. I'll buy four, so I'll get two free, making it a total of six books.

SIX.

SIX.

Okay, I know the one book I'm going to get.

J.R Ward's Lover Unleashed (went to Wiki to check the title before seeing the tenth book would be released in March*goes into fangirl mode*)

Perhaps, a Stephen King. Maybe It or The Shining.

and what would be my four other books?

This is where you guys are needed. I need suggestions. If can, no books that are part of a series because you'll just get me hooked then I'llbedoomedinbuyingthose and then I'll ignore everything else which is bad.

So, ideas?

I'll super appreciate it.

Love,

This Song Reminds Me Of: If Only For One Night

This is a new section I thought up of a few weeks ago. Mokesart seemed to think it would be a good idea so, here is it.



Let me hold you tight, If only for one night

I used to be into Harry Potter fanfiction, like few years ago. I read a lot. I wrote some. I'm a fan of those short/one shot fics where the couple (Usually Harry/Hermione or Draco/Hermione) are deeply in love with each other but it just can't be or when only one is in love while the other feels a deep affection for their friend.

Your eyes say things I'll never hear from you

One of those fics led me to this song which then became a favourite of mine. I listened to it and thought up plots that would go well with it but never really wrote any down. Come to think of it, I think I'll be pretty good in writing those romance where you'll start crying from the injustice of it about halfway in.

God, I think I predicted my love life back then.

I just closed my eyes, listening to this song for the 3rd time in a row and I was reminded by a story I once wrote. Well, more like a scene because that's my style. Maybe I'll write it down soon (when I'm supposed to be studying), give some new touch to it before letting my editor edit it and tell me to stop being so melodramatic as he compliments me.

I won't tell a soul, No one has to know, If you want to be totally discreet

Interview By the Mokesart.

Mokesart just interviewed me. Go read it.

Go go go.

Hunky Mushroom Fried Rice.

From The Secret Life of Prince Charming by Deb Calleti:

"Good looks too often meant, I expect to be forgiven. It was too bad his appearance made my eyes so happy- the rest of him would likely make me miserable."




I was buying dinner, sitting at a table, waiting for my to-go order to be ready (Fried Rice with Mushrooms, sunny side up on top) when I saw this ... hunky eye candy. I admit that I'm not one who think looks = everything but like a guy who can't resist staring at a cleavage that's paraded in front of him, I stared.

He dressed to show off his hunkiness *smacks head* and I fell for it. I literally turned around in my seat just to keep my eye on his tushie and strong armshim. If I was a guy, I would be sporting a boner. Well, half-mast. I shook my head when he got out of sight, feeling disgusted with myself for such ogling before thinking that he's probably one of the biggest jerk I've ever set my eyes on.

Hanis. Stop judging someone.

I then came up with this whole theory thing involving looks and personality.

*clears throat*

It is part of human's nature to sometimes think that a physically attractive person would be the owner of a good looking personality. Which is possibly such a big mistake.

Case :

Good looking guy. You swoon, you sigh. You look at him and your mind comes up with a whole story book romance where he is the sweetest ever guy in the whole universe. But then, here's the interesting part. He doesn't. He might not have such a bad personality but since its not as perfect as his exterior, in your mind, you label him as jerk.

The same goes for women. You see Miss I Look Like an angel and then discover its more of Miss Demanding inside. She might not even be that bad, hell, she might just be an ordinary personality but its sub par compared to her looks. Hence, bitch.

Boy, those good looking people sure have a lot of things to live up to, right?

This reminds me of what I read in an articles ages ago. I think I've mentioned it before in this post of OML guys. Maybe. If I didn't, it said that we should treat everyone in the same way. Not judge just from their looks.

Pit Stop One.

Have I mentioned for the past week I've been living in Mamon's room at the hostel? Well, now I'm back home for a pit-stop aka, wash my clothes, get fresh ones and enjoy my own bed for one night before going back. I'll be having few super hectic days as I'll have a paper on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. Talk about suicide?

Today's paper went well, I hope I'll get a good grade so I can make up for any bad grades. Talking about today, lack of sleep and nerves led me to a funny(well, it didn't seem so this morning) situation. I was sitting in the hall, about to fill up a slip so I took out my examination slip to check the code and group.

Now, all throughout the semester, I thought it was Regression Analysis when it was actually Fundamental of Regression Analysis. So, with little sleep and coffee in my veins, I got panicked. I saw that I registered two English subjects. I was thinking of cases of people forgetting to register one subject but at least they noticed before they're actually sitting in the hall.

I told my friend, Ekin in a very helpless panicky voice.

"Ekin, I didn't register this subject."

My five friends around me all got wide eyed with the "Oh shit" expression on their faces. I handed Ekin the slip and calm, level headed girl she is, she pointed out the last subject in the list and stated:

"Hanis, I see it."

Bella: You just gave me a mini heart attack.

Naqa: You're panicking Hanis. Calm down.

Yes, Mama and Mokesart laughed when I told them. So did my two other friends. I see the humour in it, now. Thank god my friends took my panic state into consideration so I'm not teased, yet. I'm sure once the guys hear this, I'll be hearing about it all the time.

Oh yes, the house has a new addition to it. What is it?

Its a pretty orange and white 5 month old kitten with no name attached to it yet.

I'm for Marmalade. Or Crookshanks. We'll see. He's staring at me from inside his big cage, resting in of all places, his litter box. I just want to gobble him up.

Song. Study.

I'm currently studying a subject that I don't really hold dear to my heart. Like a normal person, I'm listening to music while doing the calculations. Of course, there will be songs that I keep repeating over and over that I'm sure people around are glad for the invention of earphones. Here's one song which I seem to love.

2012 Smells Like Coffee.

I don't believe in aiming high.

I know, what kind of person am I if I don't have dreams? But looking at it from the other side, I'm simply saving myself from dissapointment. Its not like I don't wish to get certain things, I just don't go on about it.

What the heck are you talking about Hanis?

Well, results. For one.

Last semester, some of my classmates went on about how they're aiming to get 3.8 or the dean's list (3.5 and above) while I was minding my business, furiously hoping to not fail a paper, again. So, my aim was simply to pass everything.

Well, I not only wish to pass everything but I'll try as hard as I can to get at least 3.0 so my average would be a pretty thing to look at.

This is the also the reason why I don't have any resolutions for this year. Okay, I have one. I want to be able to usher in 2013. Simple as that. I know if I resolute to lose weight, I'll dissapoint myself. I'll just try to eat healthy, walk a lot and boom, I'll be okay.

Of course, everytime I hope this year would be the year I'll meet the guy meant for me Logan Lerman but if I don't, there's next year. I think he's shy and hiding from me.

Here's a post from last year that still applies today.