I Need One of Those Warning Signs

Or get a custom made one to wear on a necklace or maybe a BIG one with a pole of its own.

Maybe one to hang on my door.

Or like a calendar, just set it down there for all to see.


Bad Mood
Come forth with Hugh Jackman offerings of dark chocolate.

Do not approach with stupidity.

She snaps.

Itchy Itchy Fingers

*slips in earphones, taps taps on my phone, choosing one song to be played again and again*

There's just too much that time cannot erase

My fingers are itching. They're always hovering over the keyboard, waiting for my mind to give a command. Or for my mind to come up with a plot. Idea. Inspiration. Anything.

And duh, I'm posting nearly every weekday. But I need a story to write. My creative juice is all dried up ever since the bigkabaamiwishicancastrateyou event. I've tried. I managed few paragraphs and either I get a mental block.

*imagines a wall*

Or I just go meh and think its not worth it. No potential. Bah. I got a folder on my lappie full of stories that fall under those two.

*sighs and turns on the volume*

You cry and I wipe away all of your tears,
You scream and I fight all of your fears,
I held your hand through all of these years.



Inspiration time baby. *listens to song over and over*

I Want to Dance Everytime I Sing to This

Or The Duck Gets It

I googled dark chocolate with mint.

Too many tempting pics came up.

Buy me some or say bye bye to the duck.

*holds up a non-existent duck*

Stupid Anger Releasing Post That Might Get Deleted When I'm Calm.

I'm in a bad mood. Ugly one.

When I get into one, I prefer to hole myself up in my room and give the middle finger to everyone. Seriously, its like being a bear who's hibernating during the winter. Everyone who watches cartoons know that when you disturb said bear, the bear will roar and be very grumpy and will definitely bite your head off in the next minute unless you run away realllly realllly fast.

But in my case, I won't bite your head off. I'll give you reasons to want to wash my mouth with soap. Or bitch slap me. I don't fucking care who you are. I'll be telling you to do unspeakable things with unspeakable objects. That is when I lose control of my willpower to just keep quiet.

*deep breaths*

I'm being quiet. I'm holed up in my room. I got a nice "Stay away" with a busy sign as my yahoo status. I want to fucking hurt someone. I want to fucking throw something against the wall. GAH.

Reason of my menopausal mood? I have no idea. Which is bad. Since it cuts down my reason to rant about it and let the steam off. I'm just typing away on here while cursing that its Monday tommorow and how the weekend was a big waste of time. And how there is nothing decent to eat in the kitchen. And how I'm such a *shuts up*

*deep breaths* See? I can pick faults in anything. Even in everyday mini problems that never bothered me before.

Fuck this.

*screams into my pillow*

weiosdhfnvoqwihenjfiwhjfpoqjApoXLg2wi0aebnpskOczl

ARGH.


I'm going to make sure my clothes for tommorow is ready before going to sleep.

Pink, Crooked, Tears

I had a dream

Where you were in black,

A starched cravat tied simply,

Pink carnation in hand and a crooked tilt on those lips,

They formed around the letters of my name,

Warm breath against my cheek,

Sweet oh so tempting scent lingering,

Long and strong, your fingers slide between mine,

Secrets whispered up a trail to my ear,

Deep teasing,

Your laughter were at my blush,

Shivers running in our spines,

You press patience into my hand,

Smile at the sun,

Words of parting,

Sweet sorrow hope longing sadness,

I woke up,

Pink carnation in hand,

Crooked smile on lips,

Tears in eyes.

I Think I Got a Defense Mechanism

It starts with No 3. The reason I went through 3 months of self appreciation and love and holding myself back from humping jumping a guy and it was hard. Boy, I've always been a person who get crushes and the familiar excitement.

*Has a flashback to my highschool days*

I was craazzzzzzzzyyyy. I swear. My hormones has since then stop raging like a maniac. But not fully so. I'm talking like I hate the crushes but nooo, it makes me who I'am.

I'm not boy-crazy. Or men-crazy xD but still I enjoy an eye candy or mental candy and if I find one who's both? I'll get weak in the knees.

So refering to my title, it seems that if I'm talking to a guy who in any way gives me a omgthisisjustlikeno3 feeling my mechanism acts up and I just stop whatever's happening. No way in hell am I letting history repeats itself despite being an ultra strong personality that self heals.

But of course, there's exceptions, true?

Cue.

But darling, you are the only exception.

I just love that song.

And yes, my defense mechanism was aching to get active so I can just kick him away. But bestie Noelle, remember her? My bitch geek yesterday, in a total soap opera worthy moment, found out that we know the same guy.

"Is he sane?"

"He's not like No.2"

"Is he like ... No.3 ?"

"He's way better *mumbles insults about No.3* "

And that's not the whole convo but believe me I was excited. So fingers crossed on this crush?

*cross fingers*

Peace Out.

16 More Minutes and I'm Outta Here

Been a while since I last did a countdown post, true? Today I've been busy with work and its quite fun.

*did some work*

11 more minutes.

Its Thursday already and Saturday, the bro will get his braces on.

*winces, remembering the day I got braces on*

I feel sorry for him, knowing his pain tolerance level.

*mutters to self* lowwwww

Anyway, 9 more mins.

I better start packing.

*is enjoying listening to Hotel California by Eagles*

8 minutes.

Derek Walcott Taught Me a Lesson

Give back your heart to itself,

To the stranger who has loved you all your life,

Whom you ignored for another,

Who knows you by heart.

Full version

I Feel Like a Big Sister

"How do you study for History?"

I was having fun cooking on Cafe World when the lil bro came in with a "I'm gonna die" look I know so well. Its the look you get when you see the future of failing your exams. Being the older sister, I tried to set an example.

"Its so easy. Just freaking memorise the book,"

Pained look intensifies.

"The whole book? But I got 8 subjects,"

"Not the text book! The reference book. You got one for every subject right?"

A shrug.

A groan.

"Go to your bookcase and look for them, now,"

Shuffles off.

And I resumed my Cafe World, assuming by guiding him to the books, he'll see the way to study and get shit loads of A's.

"I got them. Then?"

......

He's smart. I admit that. But once you get to secondary school, its so different. And you obviously need to sit down and memorize stuffs. Which was easy for me because my brain absorbs the info and once I sit down for the paper, it comes out nicely and by the time I pass it up, allll of the knowledge is gone from my brain.

Staring at my brother, I decided the boy needed some ... scaring so he won't think the finals will be as easy as the last 6 years. I know, evil of me. But its for his own good.

"You're so dead,"

"Nuh uh,"

"Oh yes you are. You know what happens if you don't get a shitload of A's?"

"What?"

"Mama will be mad and won't let you upgrade your PSP. And that's not all,"

"No?"

"Dad will be mad and you can say bye bye to your computer. And using the internet."

"But but.."

"You're doomed if you don't start studying now,"


And that's how I ended up writing down a study schedule to my brother and telling him to check with me every night on his progress.

Wow. For the first time I feel like a big sister.

You Got Me at The Book is Way Better Than the Movie

Not hello. Its a bit ... well, odd for me. The concept of love at first sight. Everytime I hear that phrase, my mind goes to imagine mode and cue :

Boy walks into a crowded room.

Girl gets the urge to look away from her gossiping circle at the far end of said room.

They lock eyes. Fall in love. Happily ever after.

Lack of details? Okay, he has pretty blue eyes and like, dark bangs or one of those cute emo hairstyles. And her hair will be up in a long ponytail. Freckles across her nose.


Its really unbelievable for me. If its lust at first sight, true. That happens all the time. Heck it happened to me the first time I saw him and it was a series of me naming the new Mr Hanis. *roll eyes*


*tries to remember the purpose of this post*

*looks at title*

Ahhhh, I was remembering a chat I had with an online friend about two weeks ago about a book I planned to buy.

The Time Traveler's Wife.

Yeah, I usually avoid books that are made into movies after the movie came out. Not even watching the movie. What? Its one of my weird oddity. But come on, most movies are crappy. I think its because the directors lack the insight into the book. You want to make a freaking good movie, go freaking read and love the book. Don't analyze it.

If you love the book, your mind will have a whole world in it for the book. Trust me. I got Harry Potter and friends walking around in my mind.

*stops rambling*

So back to my desire to buy the book after reading a post on how good it is and shitty the movie was.

Hanis: I'm thinking of buying a book.

Him: Which one?

Hanis: The Time Traveler's Wife

Him: That's a great book. The movie was shitty.

*falls in love immediately*

HELL NO. Just a crush. Maybe.

An Act of Love That Brings Tears to My Eyes

*is listening to Mariah Carey's Through The Rain*

*is reading Wikipedia on Marilyn Monroe*

Joe DiMaggio, Marilyn's ex hubby apaprently commited an act of love so powerful (to me) that I'm blinking away tears.

After her death, he claimed her body and arranged the funeral. Which is not the act I'm talking about.

For 20 years, he had half-dozen red roses delivered to her crypt three times a week.

Yes, its not the most powerful act but it just brings tears to my eyes.

Will anyone remember and mourn me after I die? Let alone put roses on my grave. Or even look at the stars and think of me.

Oh Yes, Today's the Day I've Been Waiting For

Its the 21st September 2010.

No, its not the day Hugh Jackman's gonna propose to me.

Or the day Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore approaches me ;)

Or the day I get marry.

Or the day a certain guy realises that we're meant to be as it is said in the stars.

Fine. I'll stop rambling.

Its the 3 months mark.

So now I'll just head out and fall head over heels for a guy and rush into another doomed relationship.

Okay, I won't do that.

I'll just wait for Christian Bale to come by.

But the important question is how do I feel?

*pokes and probes my feelings*

Its still the same with less intensity in the sadness section. So is the anger section. Acceptance is more prominent. Maturity has boosted up about 4 points. Not that it influences my "I hope you'll end up lonely and old" thoughts.

But still, I'm not gonna chuck out my castration manuals.

You Got Brown Eyes Like No One Else

So, today I listened to Bad Romance so many times over and over and over and over. I thought of writing a post based on it. Like, using some of the lyrics and being random. You know, being Hanis. And then I saw a post from a blog I follow about Lady Gaga performing Speechless and yes, I 've only heard it twice but I love it

I'm not one of those avid little monsters of hers. But her songs are different though I don't listen to each one over and over and over.*stops rambling*

Rambling is one of my talents. I also have this way of connecting things through so many things before coming to a conclusion. Or its just plainly I love talking. When I was younger, this often happened :

Dad: Did you get the money for school today from Mama?

Me: Well, Mama didn't have time to make lunch today because she had to take the bro to the clinic because he has a fever so by the time she got back it was already 12 so-

Dad:Hanis.

Me: Yes. But I got extra because of the no lunch thingie because-

Happened often.

What was I talking about? Oh yes, Speechless. So I now got it playing from youtube and then decided to listen to another great song from her, Again Again.

*sighs happily*

Its a nice song and it reminds me of two guys at one without any reason and- ... Okay, and I also like the meaning of this song ;)

Yes, one my weaknesses.

Enjoy. And the topic? My fave line from the whole song.

I Would Post the Video But Its Too Scandalous

And who knows, my mom might stumble onto this blog... Okay, my dad.... Or my brother... Okay, okay, one of my cousins. Fine. Geez.

Anyway, I was bored and on Google so that could only mean Time to Google Random Shits.

*cackles to myself in a corner*

So it went on, usually of random people from school or ex-crushes or something I read about. But of course, my fave topic? Me. Or anything to do with me.

I already got bored of googling my name and nickname so I decided to google the title of my blog.

*points upwards* Yes, scroll up to the maximum.

Did my blog came up? Nope.

But a song by Elektra (or is it Electra?) came up.

*clicked on the youtube link*

*watched*

*got mind blown*

I'am now addicted to this song.

Like, how-I-was-listening-to-Goo-Goo-Dolls'-I'll-be-again-and-again-till-my-housemates-memorised-it addicted.

Yes, I'm that terrible.

But just a head's up, the video is ... pretty entertaining as in the adult entertainment.

Or as a male friend said after viewing my current obsession

"I can't believe its on youtube!"

Curious?

Step 1: Open new tab because you still need to view the rest of my instructions, true?

Step 2: Type www.youtube.com in that bar thingie up there.

Step 3: Type I Don't Do Boys in the search thingie.

Step 4: Find one by Elektra/Elektra.

Step 5: Click.

Step 6: Let it buffer till the end.

Step 7: Watch and wonder what the hell am I raving about until the first minute has passed.

Warning: If you're totally underage, don't put the blame on me if the video is deemed too adult-ish for your afe. And, if you're against people swinging the other way, do stop watching. Like, seriously.

Step 8: Get mind blown. Or hot and bothered. Or perhaps turned on. As it all did happened to me.

I don't do boys,
Just do girls,
Just do girls with style and class.

I'll Wake Up With a Wonderful Outlook. As If.

19th September 2010.

Two more days before the big 3 months mark.

"A third of the relationship's length is a nice time to grieve and love yourself before embarking on a new one"

Well, that's not bestie's exact words but you get the gist.

So after intense calculation, I'm supposed to be all good on the morning of the 21st September.

Hah.

I don't think so.

*reads up castration guidebooks*

Father Time Loves His Practical Jokes

Why is it Sunday?

Working again tommorow.

*weeps*

Discussion With My Geek

Last night, I had a meaningful talk with my bitch geek bestie about my nightly adventures and apparently, according to her :

"I deal with mentally, not mystically,"

Which I have to admit made me pout and her next sentence made it an epic pout

"You might not like what I have to say about it,"

It was plainly a warning but did I take it?

No.

I insisted in asking her opinion on something. While not mentioning the main star of my adventures.

So it went on like :

Hanis wheedles for an explanation.

Noelle gives. A full lengthy one. With name mention.

Hanis tries to deny the identity with a lame ass

"I didn't say it was *insert name*"

"Hanis, I read your blog,"

Damn the deities for making her a reader. (I don't mean this at all bestie dear. I love you with all of my rainbow coloured heart)

So apparently, according to her, its wish fulfillment or something.

I should have taken the warning and google up websites on meaning of dreams. I could have been beaming now after reading some pages on how it means that we're meant to be.

Its written in the stars.

Inspiration of romance novels.

Just waiting for him to realise it.

Stuffs like that.

Any of you out there is a person educated in reading the meaning in dreams? I'll give you my second born godchild.

Love you.

One By One They Click The Magic Button

It still amazes me that I have followers. Let alone, eight. Well, if you look down at the followers section, you'll see seven but one of them decided to follow in secret.

But thank you so much lovely people. I'll give you my first born godchild. Which is actually Noelle's first born child. *giggles to myself, hoping she won't see this promise*

Anyway, Mama just called and gave out a list of chores.

*sighs*

Peace out.

Two Nights in a Row? Boy, I'll Die in Pleasure

Yes, the title seems to be very .... scandalous but I assure you, I merely have a fancy of titles that will make my followers (All lovely 7 people that I now love more than my first born child, who will come one day in the future) go ooooooh my goshhh, that seems sooo scandalous, which translates to must read.

For the past two nights, I've been having dreams, innocent sweet dreams of a certain ... infatuation from the past. Four years to be exact. Let's not count the months, okay? I will not reveal the level of my obsession with said infatuation.

But these dreams, are long and nice. Its the dream that happens after you woke me in the middle of the night at around 3 in the morning for a quick visit to the bathroom before running back under the nice green blanket.


And god.


*sighs happily*


Can I say that I woke up smiling? And BAM, infatuation lives on. Do listen to Christina Aguilera's song Infatuation. I simply adore it.


So here I' am, blogging at 9 in the morning after a while of being MIA which I'll explain in my next post. It will be a longgggggg one.

And oh yes, Dream Number Two? It was of me reading a comment he left on this blog.

*gives a girlish squeal*

*smacks myself*

Okay, I'm sane.

Peace out.

I was on the 7 o' clock train this morning with my ears plugged with my brand new earphones and the volume on the maximum . Yes, I know its bad for my ears. But then right after listening and bobbing my head to the likes of Usher, Hey Monday, Kesha, Katy Perry and others, this song came on and it made me literally pull out my little notebook from my bag and started writing in it.

And yes, I was in poetry mode and managed to get a small page worth of lines mentioning starts, deities and the wind flirting.

This song is just so beautiful. I remember listening to this months before I met No.1 and lying in the middle of my hostel room's floor, well on the carpet I brought from home with my headphones on and this song on repeat.

Mamon would say this is a very annoying habit of mine.

So I started singing to this song on the morning train before stashing my notebook in the bag again when I got to the station

You think you're loving but you don't know me.

Click

Click,

I count the dial tones in my head,

Letting the monotonous sound wash over me,

Vainly whispering,

Oh calm down dear heart,

Stop beating out to his rhythm,

Its only a phone call,

As my mind spat insults,

Questioning the existence of my dignity,

Click,

I count the seconds in my head,

onetwothreefour,

Two consonants of greeting,

My name followed,

Oh dear heart stop it,

Don't beat to his name,

A failed attempt to reciprocate,

A second failure,

stopthisfoolishness,

In the midst of chaotic thoughts,

I hear my name again,

Icantdothis,

My mind agrees,

Dignity my girl,

This is just a mistake,

I stammered,

Without a chance for a reply,

Receiver slamming onto cradle,

ohshitohshit,

Click.

Yes, that was my lame attempt on poetry after years of abandoning it for short fictions. Enjoy?

Those Birds Made Me Laughed

Guilty Pleasure (Psst, its about food)

Number one.

Cooking shows. Food shows. Travel/ food shows. You get me. I totally love the Asian Food Channel as it feeds this habit of mine. But since I don't really watch tv that much so don't expect me to like, know details about every show.

Right now, its about 40 minutes to breaking fast time and the food has been set on the table. Since its Saturday, Mama wasn't in a mood to cook today so they went to the bazaar and came back with fooodies *drools* There's so much. Yeap. She's guilty of overbuying stuffs.

So I'm in front of the tv right now, hogging the couch all to me and my laptop with the tv on, yes, Asian Food Channel aka AFC. My brother groaned at the sight of food *roll eyes* but yours truly totallllly ignored him as I tuck myself into Chef at Home.

Today's episode has something to do with Indian food as far as I've gathered. Ooooh, can I have his pantry? Its all stocked up and he even has his Asian food section xD. And the time I took to google the word "pantry' ended up with me missing him telling what he's making. Darn. But he's marinating steaks with soy sauce. Yuck. Don't get me wrong but here, soy sauce and steak? Yuckkk.


Anthony Bourdain. Nigella Lawson. Jamie Oliver. Hans Zimmerman. I heart Nigella Lawson. She's so tasty herself that sometimes I just ignore the food xD. Anthony and Hans are more famous with their travel/food shows and god, putting aside the weird food, I envy them. Like, if I can, I want to be like them when I grow up.

I'm not a fan of Hell's Kitchen. Its just ... it takes the focus out of food. Its more about torturing those poor unfortunate souls *says it like Ursula* but Iron Chef, I like I like.

Having a preference of foreign food because the shows just make such odd(sometimes) food look so tempting, I can't help to love watching the travel shows that comes to Malaysia. Its fun seeing local, every day food from their perspective. And at least if I get a craving from them, I know I can just go out and buy them, true?

OMG,there's an AFC studio that we can go to and join cooking classes. *will go to the website soon*

Oooh, there's Man vs Food coming up. That is one show that makes me want to pig out at times and weighing scales can be damned in the hottest of ovens.*shivers*

Talking about ovens, I'm baking choc chip cookies tonight. I got that recipe from Mamon aka my other bestie who I so dearly miss *sighs* Gossiping session will come soon my dear.

24 mins to go. I'll be going downstairs to get the drinks ready and all in about 6 more mins.

And I'm really sure that I want to marry a chef. Like Jamie Oliver or whatever. He has to specialised in chocolate based dessert. *makes a wish*

Peace out people. I think I'll write while I bake today xD.

Teach Me to Hate

And I'll teach you how to forgive.

Filling Up My Empty Days

Finally submitted my application for my degree after hmm-ing and err-ing over the 4 choice of courses. I had to take my diploma and not wanting to add unneccesary additional semesters into consideration. Since I'm in my final semester aka internship of my Diploma in Actuarial Science I'm only looking into related degree courses *waves goodbye to Culinary and TESL*

So after dragging it on for two weeks, I've finally managed to choose 4 courses, giving Statistics a swift kick *cackles*. Its an evil thing. Trust me.

1. Actuarial Science
2. Mathematics
3. Investment
4. Insurance

Yes, yes, I yawned too reading my choices. I wish there could be like Sexuality Science or something like that in there but no. I'm bound to a life of math geekiness. *laughs to myself* Naw, I'll be fine and I really hope I'll get my first choice.



Yesterday, I was emotional. And it was a smile-through-gritted-teeth award winning worthy emotional kind of day. But after a night, well, I'm just gonna move on. Look at the calendar and wait till its 3 months. 18 more days. Just 18 more days Hanis. *takes a deep breath*


Ok, and that was today's dose of emotional ranting *grins widely*


Last night I listened to some Lifehouse and may I please get a guy who can sing like that? Pretty please. With choc chips on top.


And oh yes, the title came from Saving Jane's Happy . Its a sad song actually. Let's ignore that I listened to it over and over and over yesterday.

Oversharing Never Hurt This Much

I want to go to the bathroom, lock myself in a cubicle before just crying myself until I'm a puddle of self pity on the tiles.

19 more days. And I'm supposed to be free.

Wake up with a happy ass smile and maybe a sunshine bright attitude with perhaps a slight memory loss.

Fuck no. I have more chance to see my brother dancing to a Justin Bieber song than that happening.

The one third rule? I don't believe in it.

I heard of the month per year rule before. If the one third rule doesn't work, like fucking hell the second rule would work.

I've learnt how to be a freaking hypocrite. To smile and act fuckity fuck about it. I've managed to meh things away when people show the faintest trace of pity.

And I've stopped the nightly memory lane strolls.

But fuck fuck fuck.

I think the bathroom visit is needed.

Then it will be time to kill the person who coined the phrase

Its better to love and lost than to never love at all.

Yeah, I said I'm happy for you. And I wished you luck. Thank fuck for texting benefits. You couldn't see the tears I blinked away. Or the pain on my face.

No Elle, You're Having an Affair With Kermit's Brother

Her name is Noelle and she's my bitch bestie for life. She's also the maid of honour *ducks and hides from the other people I promised* for my one-day-it-will-happen wedding as I'am the godmother to her one-day-it-will-happen kids. That is, after promising not to corrupt those innocent minds.

No, we're not childhood besties as we met around a year ago and oh yes, we're online besties who met through a mutual friend for an unmentionable reason *starts laughing to myself before kicking away the reason to a dark dusty corner* And how did we bond? Well, apparently, bitching about a common hated unagreeable female is the perfect icebreaker and could lead to such awesome friendship.



Noelle is a geek. Plain as the day. As obvious as the fact that I'm a bookworm. *ducks and hides again from her* She's one of those study-last-minute-cramming-till-my-eyes-pop-out-but-its-worth-it-cause-I-still-get-fucking-awesome-marks kinda geeks. Yes, I have a habit of wanting to smack those geeks but not this geek. She's a geek that studies Biology, Physics and all the shits I left back in highschool.And she calls me crazy for my math geekiness. You're just jealous of my awesomeness dear friend.


Vain. I call her that so often in a teasing/awe manner because in that aspect she's so totally different than me. My comments on how gorgeous I'am is like a trick I'm applying on myself to make myself believe that I'am gorgeous. Is it working? I have no idea. But my bestie here just loves showing off her hair/outfit of the day on webcam to her boyfriend/friend. And no, I haven't got that wonderful opportunity to watch her. No, Noelle, that wasn't a plea to be asked.


Here's the part where I'll get a bit emotional.


My bestie is amazing, stubborn as a mule, funny, able to read me and loyal as hell. I think if I didn't held her back, a certain person would now be bearing wounds of being castrated by a rusty butter knife. (Yes, I have a morbid fascination in that form of torture. I call it the revenge mode. Totally original. Sure.)

She's the person I can tell anything and know that I won't be judged as I do for her in return. *remembers a certain tidbit Noelle told me before laughing my head off*

Wow, just wow Noelle.

We call each other slut and we mean it as a form of adoration without any sexual innuendoes behind it. Or something like that.

And geek, thank you for being there for me since the exact moment things got bad. I know you know what moment I mean and yes, if I could do it over again, I'll take your advise this time around and spare myself from the months that followed. Thank you for being the one to hold my hand and make the required insults. For giving me updates when I can't get online during the weekdays.

Thank you for reading the letters which I still carry around with me. You're the best for replying to my wild, emotional texts out of the blue. Also for being my optimistic side. And for telling me about the 1/3 of the time rule. 20 more days bestie but I still feel like it happened yesterday.

And I sincerely appreciate you being my shoulder for the past months. I know its hard dealing with a crazy like me. One whose emotions love taking rollercoaster rides. And there's more rides coming.

I love you alligator koala bear.

And girl, you better come to me saying you've shed a tear if not cried your eyes out after reading this.

*leaves a box of tissues*