Sunday, October 31, 2010

Slightly Serious With Some Miley.

Raise your hand if you've watched Hannah Montana.

Yes, I know you watched it cause your sister/cousin/kid/godkid wanted to watch it.

What do you think of that show?

*gives a moment for you to think of that*

My opinion? I kinda like the first season. But then when the show got big and Miley Cyrus got big too I got annoyed with Hannah Montana. I don't remember when I started to think Miss Montana is actually a bad role model.


I know, I'm talking about role models. I'm not a good one myself. I'm a lazy person who loves last minute studying, have trouble cleaning up my room and on and on and on. I'm not always polite but I do try to be even when the older person is just a plain bitch.

But honestly, am I the only one who noticed that Hannah Montana is lacking in the manners department. I know, its a tv show so its not Miley but the producers/scriptwriters must have written her that way.

She's rude.

Most of the time with her dad.

And its not plain teenager rude.

Its "I'm better than you" rudeness.

And this leads to Miss Cyrus.

I have a higher opinion on Bella Swan compare to her. FYI, I think Bella Swan is a joke. So that's how low I think of this young celebrity.

I'm not touching the matter of her style of dressing. Its her body so she can be a slut if she wants to be. But there's a big difference of her looking like a slut and Kesha or whoever else looking like a slut. Wait, Kesha looks like a stoned party girl while Katy Perry looks like a total flirt. Hmmm, I have no idea for now but I'll get back to this. The difference is she came from Disney and yes, it might not be her fault but I know she has enough money to get some public relations advice.

Miss Cyrus, stop trying to push away your young fans too hard. And yes, I think your latest singles suck. Last song of yours that I liked was The Climb. Can't Be Tamed = a joke.

And of course, stop saying stupid things. I know you don't want to continue your studies. Why can't all you child stars be like Emma Watson? Okay, not everyone is smart enough to go to Brown University but come on, education is important. And you're gonna get more than that scroll at the end of it all. You'll get fucking common sense.

Some might say she's young which equals to the silly stuffs coming from her. I say she has enough money to get a manager, or again, the public relations officer or whatever.

Call me a snob, but I appreciate education. If you for some reason can't afford a proper one, just make sure you read and be intelligent. As I've said before, intelligence is a major turn on brownie point in my book.

And of course, it will lessened the number of people laughing at the words from your mouth.

Here's a kid I hope won't grow up like Miss Cyrus.

Peace Out.

Doing The Countdown Thingie.

In less than 5 hours, it will officially be November and I can start on my torture journey to 50, 000 words. I know, there's 4 zeros and some might find that daunting. Including me but I see this as a challenge and a productive way to fill up my free time. Of course:

Free time = Time I have - chores- report writing- presentation slides preparing

I can do it. I hope.

And oooh oooh, I got an award :D

Will tell more on that later.

Peace Out.

4 hours 6 mins more.

A Short One for Blog Whoring Moment.

The lovely Jodie has featured me as one of her guest poster :D

*is too excited*

The post in question is an old one from my previous blog. Yes, the blog I privated since the No.3 and I ended. It was a personal lovey blog that would be torture to read.

Why didn't I delete it?

I'm a sucker for memories.

Anyway, November is tommorow. Woooohooo.

Peace Out.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Impatient Me.

I'm in a proper writing mood. My fingers are itching to just start typing out my story. But its only the 30th October here.

*is sad*

November November, come here soon.

Yes, I'm alll geared up for the torture. I chose my plot, mulling over the names (Hell, its my fave part) and just plain waiting. Today, I went swimming after dropping off couple of my HP books to a friend who wants to read it. Then I was like "I need a hair cut,"

Its been a year since my last one so with my damp swimming pool smelling hair, I got my hair snipped off by 2 inches and got a nice fringe.

Just wait for my complaints on said fringe.

Since I have to hold back from writing my story, I've been doing poetry and the next chapter to my Letter series. Expect for that to come out this weekend :D


Totally lost my train of thought so I'm heading for a quick nap before going out with the lil bro. He needs a new computer game while I need a new book and some hair clips.

Peace Out.

Why I Love Noelle.



"Are you free in November?"

"My next semester will be starting. Why?"

"Let's do NaNoWriMo together!"

"What is it exactly?"

*sends a link*

*10 minutes later*

"I signed up, add me as your buddy there,"

That is why I love you bestie.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Soul Searching

Hello soul,
Are you whole,
Or are you not,
Will you help me,
Pretty pretty please,
Lend your assistance,
Your other half,
Yearns to unite,
Make me whole,
My dear soul.

Then End.

The minute I'm starting this post, is 61 minutes away from the end. The end of it all. 16 long weeks. 80 days. 4 months. Give or take a few days, true? I know that in 60 minutes from now, I'll walk out from this office for the last time.(I hope)

I'll have two bags with me. One will be my normal bag, the other will be full of papers and the junk I acquired for the past 16 weeks. Two magazines. A bottle of lotion. Thank god I already exhausted my tissue supply.

59 mins. Am I getting emotional? No. It will be odd though that next Monday I don't have to wake at 5.30 and be out of the house in an hour. I told the lil bro that what I'll do is oversleeping. Hell, I'll sleep until Mama screams to me to wake up.

Chores will be waiting for me. Gah. Naps too.

55 more mins. Excuse me while I distract myself with Wiki articles.

Peace Out.

Of Blog Whoring, Last Day and Brainstorming.

Have I ever mentioned that I'm a gift whore? I think I did once. I'm also a blog whore at times. I just love replying to those threads along the line of "Interesting blogs to read?". You can bet I'll be there with my link pasted all nice and pretty and tempting.

I even have my link up on my facebook and my NaNoWriMo. See, blog-whoring again. But I draw the line at putting up my facebook link. I'm a quite private person over there. Yes, I'm one of those people that makes it impossible for you to search for them and if you ever come across their profile without being a friend, you'll get to see the minimum requirements. Its irritating, I know.

But OMG, today is my LAST day.

*dances around on my chair*

Unbelieveable. I thought this day would never come. Like, ever. But here I'am, still sane. I'll give you a moment to be in amazement.

*clears throat*

Yesterday, I brainstormed for plots/ideas for my NanoWriMo project and I came up with some that have been living in my head for awhile. Or as I said to a friend:

"These ideas have been in my head for years, in an orgy of creative thoughts and plots just waiting for me to give them release."

I know. Laugh as loud as you want to.

So maybe when I'm done choosing and writing out the plot points, I'll tell you guys :)

And woot woot, 25 followers :D

Peace Out.

Thursday, October 28, 2010


When I was 16, which was around 2005, I was a Neopet crazy teen who hates hates Physic. And Additional Math. But what I wanted to say is that was the first time I heard about


Yes, I heard the drumrolls playing when you read that. I barely got halfway through of the target which is 50,000 words. I know, crazy, right? I remember thinking "Okay, next year Hanis,"

The next 4 years I always had exams in November. Which made me cried and cursed. Not because of my inability to participate in NaNoWriMo but due to my having to study.

So now, after 5 years I've decided to give it another try. Woohoo. I got an email after making an account for this year. The title of the email?

NaNoWriMo loves Hanis.

Why thank you =)

The email included tips for this torture challenge and the one that made me laughed was tell as many people as you can that you're gonna write a novel. This will help in Week 2 because the thought of embaressing yourself will be a wonderful motivator. Indeed you're right.

To anyone interested to lookie at my page there, please do so. I'll be trying to think up an idea/concept for this crazy notion.

Would You ... Tag!

Be extremely beautiful or extremely intelligent?

For sure I'm gonna be extremely intelligent. I'm already totally gorgeous. And come on, bimbo isn't such a pretty looking word. Makes me think of mambo and bingo.

Go without brushing your teeth or go without washing your hair for a year?

Damn it. Can I just shave my hair and continue brushing my teeth? No? Damn it again. I'll go without brushing my teeth for a year. They never said anything about gargle and mouthwash!

Be rich or famous?

*Hears Lifestyle of the Rich And Famous playing in the background* I want to be famous for my books. Which means leading to me having my own Wiki page!! Woohoo. I only want good fame, you know, not like being famous for being Hugh Jackman's mistress or another version of Snookie. You get me? And since I'll be famous for my books, I'll be rich too.

Be able to sing or dance?

This is easy. To sing. No, I can't dance. But I want to sing more than dance.

Be stranded on an island or a desert?

Island. Desert = little water + bright sunshine + sand + extreme temperature differences. At least I can try to be sexy on the island. ;) Coconut shells as my bra. Flowers woven in my hair. Something like that :P

Have a computer or TV?

When was the last time I realllly enjoyed TV? Hmmmmm, ages ago. Make it a laptop with a big screen, build in mic, wonderful built in webcam and long lasting battery.

Wear spots or stripes for the rest of your life?

Spots. Stripes are overrated. Spots make you look fun.

Drink out of a teacup or a mug?

A mug is bigger thus more space thus more water.

Receive a bunch of flowers or a box of chocolate?

This is a trick question. I swear it is. I'm sure my friends who read this will roll their eyes and say "DUH, Hanis is the chocolate lover. She'll pick the latter. DUH,"

Which made me think, about anyone who spent some time with me knows that I love chocolate (dark chocolate or milk chocolate, plain if you can) and can get me the box of chocolate.

But if someone reallly know me, they'll know just what kind of flowers to buy for me. And to stay away from roses and sunflowers. And orchids. I just hate those. So I'm gonna go for the flowers and see who can give me the flowers I love. (Carnations, peonies, gardenias. Nothing red or orange or yellow. Pink and white is likeable)

Have a hug or a kiss?

Urgh, can I not want either? Unless its from hot guys Marky Mark, Hugh Jackman or Johnny Depp. Hahahah, I just have a personal space issue. Which leads to a hate of physical/skin contact with strangers. Or most people unless you're my close friends/family.

But if I haveee to chooose, I'll go with hugs. Huggly Wuggly.

Wear Converse or stilettos?

Converse, I can't run from evil aliens/murderers/stalkers/zombies in the latter, right?

Be a fairy or a mermaid?

Mermaid. I wanna wear those sexy shell bras. Or maybe I've always wanted to be once since I watched The Little Mermaid over and over and over.

Coffee or Tea?

Tea. I don't do coffee, much.

Live somewhere sunny or cold?

I'm already at a sunnny place and I'm a half vampire that go urgh at sunshine. I want to try the cold. Wait, give me somewhere with four seasons.

Have an amazing house or an amazing car?

House please. Cars' values depreciates soooo fast. And I've always wanted a nice house with a wooden theme (wooden floorboards, like a cabin you know) that comes with a nice study that has built in shelves for my books. Oh yeah, indoor swimming pool too xD

Be kind or funny?

Laugh, and the world will laugh with you. Cry, and you'll cry alone.

I want to be kind.

Be hated or a hater?

I hate being hated. Hell, I need people to like me. But hating takes a lot of hardwork. If I'm hated, will I have someone or two who loves me? A guy who is totally devoted to me? Then yes.

If you have to choose, lose your sight or hearing?

Hearing. I have so many books to read. And if I can't hear, it just means I can't hear the hurtful things people say about me :)

Have lots of money or lots of friends?

Friends. Need I explain?

Love or be loved?

I'm tired of being the one who loves the jerkasshole that don't appreciate you. I've loved people who don't give a fuck about it. This time, I want to be loved and appreciated.

What to do now if you've been tagged:
1. Copy the Would You Rather picture and put it into your own post
2. Answer all questions
3. Tag others

The lovely Jodie tagged me so I'll be tagging *looks in list*

Kim who's blog is fun :D

Simone from The Top Bunk

and of course


Woot. I wish I can tag Hugh Jackman. Or Marky Mark.

Peace Out.

Letter In The Morning.

Dear Lady in the Lift,

Yes you, the only person who was in the lift this morning. I think you heard me asking you to hold the doors open. But did you? Nope. Thank you so much. I so enjoyed having the doors slide close just in front of me with you standing demurely in the middle of the lift looking at me so innocently. FYI, innocent/demure look don't work in your 40's. But then, perhaps you have a hearing problem. Or just plain laziness. Hope to run into you again.


Wednesday, October 27, 2010

He Sang of Me.

Sing for me,

In every bar you stop at,

Say my name,

Choose a song to dedicate,

Make them ask,

At the tremble in your voice,

Sweet sorrow,

Crooning from your guitar strings,

Shed a tear,

As your fingers danced on keys,

I loved you,

Listen and cry you whispered.


Noelle Is Still Laughing

Noelle : Hanis is a shy person (stop laughing Noelle)*refers to my post*

Hanis: Indeed I'am

Noelle: =))

Hanis: I'am!

Noelle: :)) Whatever

Hanis: I'm good at predicting your reactions.

Noelle: Yes.

*is a shy person*

Peace Sign Index Finger Down.

Its Wednesday morning here :D Wooohoo. Two more days till Friday, my very very last day of internship. *dances like a crazy chicken* Trust me, I look like that dancing. But since I'm one of those sentimental people, I'm gonna miss this place, a bit. *gives a moment of tearing up before smiling again*

News 1

I was bored out of my mind passing time by reading the forums here and I saw this lovely lovely person promoting my blog in a "Interesting blogs suggestions" kinda-ish thread that I replied to. I blushed and smiled to my ears while reading it and then I had to resist the urge to gloat about it. Yes, it means no calling over random people to my lappie and showing them the comment. And of course, I didn't copy the link and gave it to my friends. So thank you so much kendra30752 :D

News 2

I gave one of my supervisor the evaluation form and he gave me a peek and *giggles* its alll excellent, well, except for my people skills which is only good. *sulks* Mama always said I don't mingle and socialise well since I have this "If you talk to me, I'll talk back." attitude. I'm just shy people xD I swear. Hanis is a shy person. (Stop laughing Noelle, I'am shy)

That's the 2 bits of news I was eager to tell. Yesterday, Dad and I hitched a ride with his brother, my Uncle (duh) because Dad's new car is only coming today. So after picking us up, we went to pick up my Auntie before heading back home. The traffic wasn't THAT bad but still, it took us about 90 mins to get home. And for about 87 mins, the conversation was mostly about cars.

Uncle : I heard the price of Car A went down due to yadayadayada

Dad : That's cause they're going to release a new model yadayadaya

Hanis : *half snoring in the backseat*


I think I'll be posting again today on some other random shits. And maybe my first ever poem that has some sort of rhythm/flow.

Peace sign, Index finger down.
- Gym Class Heroes
Been stuck in my head since last night.
Peace Out.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Dear Management

Dear student system at the hostel,

I'm coming back next semester, I know you missed me and my lack of participation in activities. Of course, I'm one of those who sent in the activity card with only 2 coupons last year. In my defense, Mamon and the rest did the same too.

The reason of this nice letter is to remind you to give me a room come this year end. Yes, I'll be a degree student and I know we have to pay for our boardings so don't worry. My parents will be more than glad to pay the RM400 needed to get me out of their hair. Its cheaper than getting me a car.

Word of advise? Please don't let me get another weird roomie, especially with degree students being in the 2 person rooms instead of the 4 person rooms. What, you don't know what I mean about weird roomie? Well:

A) Remember the one in my 4th semester? You know, the girl who was always on the phone, talking to her boyfriends. Yes, she's no monogamist. It was torture listening to her cooing in her fake little girl voice about how she's not as pretty as so-and-so. Fake modesty. Let's not forget when she was in a temper. The little girl voice went out of the window. Wait, she even like crying sometimes. Wow.

But thank god she didn't last long. She decided to run away after the short Chinese New Year's break because her parents wouldn't let her 21 year old self get engaged. I was relieved I didn't have to hear her heavy hip hop ringtone again.

B) One roomie in my 3rd semester was a sunshine freak. =.= GOD NO. She wouldn't stop pulling open the curtains alll the way back even with our room facing the busy main road. Did she care that I slept at 5 after a night of studying? No. Did she noticed I literally buried my face under the pillows due to being in the bed beside the window? Yes. Did she care? No. Did she had to pull open the curtains on my side as well? No. Did she? Yes.

So please no more plants-like roomies who needs the sunshine for their respiration system. Or whatever it is. I'm a half vampire, remember? And I don't sparkle thank you.

C) Last sem roomies. Two of them. I don't mind the third one. This one is specific. In fact, I'm gonna send a letter to the recruitment part, asking them to place those two in another course so I don't have to see them again.

D)Any coursemates of mine except for Mamon who I love so much.

E) Roomies during my 2nd sem, who all loved putting on their alarms at loud. And never seem to wake up.

Other than the above, I beg for you not to place me with a born-again, holier-than-thou individual. Don't blame me if they come in to report being bitch slapped by yours truly. Yes, I'm still living on the " I'm not messing in your business so who the fuck gave you the right to do so with mine?" way of thinking.

I'll love you so much if you give me Mamon as my roomie. I'll even participate in the activities with an increase of 12% in participation. It will be easier for both you and me if you do this. Love you long time hostel management.

Peace Out,
Hanis .

Everytime I Flip Open My Phone

I see this and smile.

Monday, October 25, 2010

When She Talks, I Bet You Yearn For Me.

Life is sweet you know? Just this morning I wrote a wonderful post wishing the best for No.3 and somehow by fate's intervention I managed to have a chat with the slut girlfriend who didn't know that I kinda figured it out that its not No.3 I'm chatting to.

How did I guess it's not him?

a) The constant usage of "u" instead of "you"

Honey, I have my standards and that kind of typing is a big NO-NO for me.

b) The lower standard of English

c) The excessive sharing of private details.

He might be a jackasshole but he's not that crude. Even when he decides to be so

d)The lack of creative storytelling.

Again, I'm picky.

e) I have familiarity with him. After months of chatting to him. So my instinct had a feeling ;)

I might have said that he's a bit odd. To which "he" denies and 3 mins later "he" was offie.


Boy, I know you downgraded after me. But that bad? Wow.

*muahahahhas again*

And yeap, I know she's that perfect weight = 115 so congratulations. :D

It just seems with you getting a girl with less weight, you had to downsize the IQ level too.

Note: I'm not saying thin girls are dumb. Not at all. It just refers to No.3's attempt to make me lose weight with his "I'm afraid I won't be attracted to you."

Yes, he's Mr Go Bugger a Twink.

Yes, I'll pass on your "Fuck You," to him.

He told me to be 115.


He got some girl that weight who's two inches taller than me. And with less IQ.

You can't get everything.

*is sorry for the way this post is just jumping from line to line, lacking smoothness.

A Stack of Letters and Its a Personal One.

First thing first, its the last week of my internship :D. So its my last Monday here for my 16 weeks internship program. *dances a jig under my table* I made it. I made it. Oh yeahhh. Woohoo.

*clears throat and compose myself*

This morning, I mean, about 20 mins ago before I had my breakfast, I was looking for tissue in my bag and I came across the stack of letters . Yes this letters are the inspiration to my attempt at a multi-chapter story.

I counted the letters. There's 20.

I looked for the last one, dated 22nd June 2010.

I looked for the first one, dated 30th March 2010.

I didn't read any of them because hell, I'm not going to risk it and end up crying my eyes out here at my desk in the middle of the office.

Yes, I still cry reading them. I've been carrying the stack around with me for the past 4 months. And I'm proud that I've only read them once. Which ended up with me crying into my pretty pillow =.=

So here's to 4 months 4 days of me being amazingly gorgeous and myself.

And here's to you, No.3 who I know is totally regretting his asshole actions hope is happy with his live-in slut girlfriend. And FYI, your telling me about how happy you are with said slut girlfriend tells me enough on how much you regret it. Enjoy your life knowing you'll never get someone as good as Hanis.

Sorry boy but you've missed out.

Peace Out.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Cooking Show Dreams

Lunch Menu

Prepared by the gorgeous Hanis

Tuna Mushroom Mayo Pot Pie

Chocolate Chip Pastry

Credits to Mama for the ingredients.

Eaten and appreciated by the lil brother.

Thank you.

Peace Out.

Friday, October 22, 2010

I Give You Wings, You Want Ribs.

Excuse my butchering of a Malay saying as the title of this post. I changed some of the wordings before translating it word-by-word. In case you're wondering what's the original saying:

Bagi betis nak peha

And the word-by-word translation:

Give calf want thigh.

Fuck that. See how ugly that kind of translating is? Erase that from your memory people and just read that the meaning of the saying is that People are never satisfied with what they have. And yes, they use body parts in a saying. And I think its not the only one. I remember one where it mentions a turle in a small boat. Oh wait, here it is:

Kura-kura dalam perahu, Buat buat tak tahu.

I won't scarred you with another word-by-word translation but it says a turtle in a boat, pretend not to know.

It sounds stupid but in Malay, it rhymes and I like using it xD. Just for the sake of the rhyming sound. People usually use this saying when they want to accuse/say someone is pretending to be in the dark on a certain matter.

So going back to the first saying, it was chosen as a way for me to start with my slight rant/post of this lunch break. Woohoo. I love blog hopping. I love reading blogs about life. It gives me a nice insight on how people of different upbringings/walks and whatever live. And somehow I think it makes me more tolerant of other faiths/cultures. Not that I have a problem concerning that but still, there is always room for improvement, true?

I also have a guilty pleasure of reading blogs that are angry/cynical/depressive at life. An insight too, perhaps? Or maybe it tells me that Hanis, you're not the only one who thinks life should be kick in the ass. And anything along that.

One of the things I've always come across on is girls lamenting on how fat they are. And sometimes there are pictures of them and I go like

"Damn girl, I'll kill to have that body/weight,"

Yes, I'm overweight but whatever, I'm gorgeous then and I'm gorgeous now as I'm in a slow battle of shedding some weight so I can totally show off up in front of guys that overlooked me people and tell them to fuck off,they missed out their chance smile demurely.

And perhaps those girls just can't see how gorgeous they are. Its okay if they're like me. HAHAHA. I mean, if they have a healthy attitude with perhaps a day or two of "I think I'm ugly" vibe going on every month. But it just breaks my heart to read on how they bash on their appearance without any sign of confidence.

Like, girls. Listen to me, if a guy wants you to be slender, read: very thin, tell them they can go bugger a twink. Hell, I should have said that to No.3 when he told me I should be like, light enough for him. Asshole, go build up on your muscles so you can carry more weight.

So repeat after me. You are gorgeous.


Make that your mantra. If you wanna be thin its because you want to. Not because of some magazine saying you should be a certain size. Not because a guy wants you to (remember, "Bugger a twink").

Beauty fades.
Wealth gets spent.
But I will always love you.

And if you still find it hard, take some of my Mama's advice which I admit was given to me about 7 years ago when everyone else had such cool phones, like everyone in the whole world except for me. Note: Don't use everyone in the whole world line. Won't work.
So Mama said this to me:

"Hanis, there are kids out there who don't even have their own phones"

"But but,"

"Just think this everytime you think you're lacking something, there's someone else out there in worse conditions,"

And now I'm totally using that, well after giving the saying some tweaks.

If you think you're fat, there's someone fatter out there.

If you think you're ugly, there's someone uglier out there.

If you think you're stupid, there's loads of idiots out there.

And so on.

So love yourself *tells that to myself too*

Peace Out.

Some Lines From a Song About Jane.

Tap on my window
Knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to
Get so insecure
Doesn't matter anymore.
Adam Levine, Maroon 5 -She Will Be Loved

Thursday, October 21, 2010

I Already Named My Future Kids. Any Offers to be Their Daddy?

For the past 3 years of being in Uni, I've gotten used to being around friends that doesn't aim to get marry after a certain age. Wait, I need to elaborate. Here, the normal view is that if a girl gets marry after 25, its a bit late. Yes yes, I can be a maiden aunt at 26. Or something.

The usual trend I''ve seen among university/college students is that (keep in mind, I'm talking about the girls) they're aiming to get marry, if they even talk about that, after knowing that they are secure and successful enough in their job. I usually ask them what's their definition of secure and successful.

The usual answer is "Having my own house/ car or have significantly supported my parents,"

And being me, I sometimes had blurted out

"Unless you're making big money, that will mean a long wait before you settle down,"

And that, apparently came out as an insult more often than not.


But its a bit different from my course-mates, well the ones I'm nice with. They don't set certain goals or a certain age. In fact, most of them (pervy lil kids) wants to be marry off asap. Okay, just kidding. Not asap. But, perhaps in the next 4 years with us being 21 now.

Don't start thinking we're a group of " I want to be barefooted at home" kinda girls. Excuse me but we are actuarial science students and not typical girls.

Its just the fact that we don't see marriage as a stick in the mud for a career. We don't see marriage as slowing one down. We just see it as a time to be like rabbits time where we can grow and share and develop ourself together.

Let's not even start on our "I want a baby" instinct. *is not immune to this unless after taking care of my lil cousins*

So imagine the reactions I got from my old highschool chums when I went "Aww, I want a baby boy of my own. I want to get married!!" (said in a joking way).

"Hanis, are you crazy?"

"Are you're going to throw your studies away?"

"What's the matter with you???"

Geez gollywhizz people. Its not happening tommmmorow. Or even next month. I'm still looking for the future daddy, remember? Marky Mark AND Hugh Jackman is unavailable, sadly.


I've forgotten the point of this post. Again. But I know it has something to do with different ways of looking at a situation. Or something. SO what do you think of my post? Am I crazy for already having a list of names for my 4 kids (2 of each) or is this just normal?

Peace Out.

P/S: I get dibs on Alexandria, one of my future lil girls would be named that and called Xandria. Wooohooo.

Noelle Hit Me About 129 Times

"My blog has been viewed 129 times by people from where you are,"

"Since when?"


"I've been checking yours once every 2-3 days,"

"Since July,"

'That's about correct,"

"You qualify as a stalker now,"

I love you bitch bestie.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Adventures in QueueLand - First Leg of the Journey.

So you're in a queue that's moving slowly. If you're a decent person, you'll try to make your turn go as smooth and quickly as you can, true? But sadly most people aren't decent. Its a wonder I haven't seen many queue rage going on. I wish some will happen. Here's some cases that happened to me that made me just roll my eyes right behind them, stiffling insults while exchanging looks with the cashier.

This happened at a 7-11 at going home time, 5.30-ish. One cashier, a long line of about 7 people with me being the 2nd person in line. This lady in front of me for some unknown reason made the cashier scanned her items a second time around. There were about 8 items. Fine.

She then decided to question the price of one of those item. Cashier went and checked and yes, its the correct price (HAH) so her price came to about RM 7.70 or something. She paid with a tenner and among her change were four 5 cent coins. You see the situation?

She then started to go "I don't want these 5 cents. I won't even use them. Give me two 10 cent coins." Like, hello? As far as I know, most fast food places or basically any where with 10% tax would be glad to get a 5 cent coin for that RM 32.85 bill.

The register was out of those damnable 10 cents so the cashier was looking for one of those plastic bags full of coins under the counter. Behind me people were getting agitated. I was tapping my foot. Sigh. Tap. Sigh.

Lady was still being a bitch so I opened my purse and pulled out a 20 cent coin, placed it on the counter and held out my hand for those 5 cent coins. I love me some small change. And ffs, the lady had a "Oh my gosh, I'm insulted" look on her face.

Well, I did had a "Move on bittch. I'm in a hurry here and so is the rest of village" look on my face. Lady went off in a huffy fit. Pffft. And of course, I paid for my drink with exact change.

Peace Out.

Monday, October 18, 2010

I Hate Those TMI Friends on My List.

Today, I spent most of my time reading a wonderful wonderful blog known as STFU, Parents. I laughed myself, shook my head in disbelief and so on. Some made me think "Woah, seriously people?" and of course some made me want to tell them to just shut the fuck up.

I don't have problems with parents. Or lil kids. Hell, I want 4 of my own one day. But I do have problems with oversharing on Facebook or any other social networks. Its okay to TMI once in a while but do you have to give a blow by blow about your recent fight with the bf(who doesn't have a FB account btw)? Before tearfully declare that you're not going to go into another relationship for like a year? And that you learnt your lesson. Let's not forget how few months later you're back with the cheating asshole and is telling everyone how happy you are.


Another thing is that Four Cube or whatever that is? Its the application that like, tell people you've checked in at so-and-so destination. I have a friend on my list who does that. He updates every damn movement.

"Has arrived at home in so-and-so,"

"Has checked into so-and-so restaurant,"

Add with his twitter updates that he somehow connects to Facebook and I'm so tempted to say

"Dang, do you think you're some kind of celebrity or are you setting yourself as an easy target?"


One word of advice to the people who overshare on any social network, shut the fuck up. Another advice? Go get a freaking blog and write down there. Blogs are okay for all your TMIs. You can indulge in your "I'm such a celeb" feeling there too.

And some might wonder why don't I just block those people?

And let go of a chance to laugh at people and their actions? Please. To those friends, do know that only a handful indulge you and your habits for the sole reason that they too are like that. The rest of us? We either had blocked your updates or are laughing at you. Its a comforting thought knowing that out there, there's someone more pathetic than us.

Get a blog. Whore out the link. Its free. And just shut the fuck up or you'll get a bitchy comment from someone.

Peace Out.

Lunch Break.

Last night's scaryhorrorghost movie was scary. Like, I screamed-face-in-pillow scary. Even though I only watched it for 10 minutes in bits and pieces. I was having too much fun skyping with a friend to go and scare myself over a scary looking old lady. Yes, she's scary looking and when *shudders* 10 minutes and I'm scarred.

*listens to Destiny's Child's Girl*

I'm your girl,
You're my girl,
We're your girls,
Don't you know that we love you.

Lunch was tasty-licious. There's this Chinese food stall selling halal food and its chinese dishes and I do love their cooking. Its better than the curries and .... other dishes that are popular in Malay food stalls. And its not that expensive. Pretty cheap if you ask me. Guess who'll be having lunch from that same place every day now?

Anyway, ... god, I don't remember my main purpose of this post =.= Wow, Hanis, there's that fine memory going again. I blame my Nescafe Ice, Christina Aguilera's Hurt and my new book as the source of distraction. But once I remember what I want to blog about, I'll tell you guys.

Peace Out.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Marky Mark Loves Me.

I bought a book. That turned out to be the 7th of a series. I blooooody hate it when that happens. Its like FFS. I just hope its one of those "You can still get the story even if you didn't read the previous ones" series.

Blame the pretty cover and thick book. I was hooked. And what made it worse, after buying the book, I walked into a bazaar on the upper floors and saw second hand books on sale. I was very very sad. Before determining to save money and buy some next weekend. WOOOHOOO.

Other than that, the delicious Marky Mark was very fun in the movie.

"I'm a peacock, you gotta let me fly,"

My Date With Marky Mark.

Remember how I wanted to buy these stuffs? Well, yesterday, yours truly managed to ruin her brand, well, over a month new earphones. T.T And I need my music.

And today I'm going off to watch Marky Mark's latest movie *is very very excited* Here's a pic to ogle him.

I know, I'm in love with him all over again. And I have my brother to thank for this wonderful future movie viewing. This convo took place on Friday night.
"Let's go watch Wall Street lil bro of mine"
"Awww, I wanna watch The Other Guys,"
"Who's in it?"
"Will Ferrell,"
"And Mark Wahlberg,"
"Let me go book two tickets in advance for Sunday,"
So Marky Mark, wait for me *sighs happily*
As a side note, I'll be buying a book and a new pair of sunnies. Wooohoooo. And maybe new earphones. Cardigan shall be bought in a shopping trip with the parents.
Peace Out.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

I Don't Do ScaryHorrorGhost Movies.

Last night, I was planning to shower around 10. Two minutes later, I was sitting on the sofa, face half buried in the pillow as Mama, the bro and me watched a scaryhorroghost movie. The one in particular is known as The Haunting in Connecticut. Yes, I had to check how to spell Connecticut.

Yes, I watched a scaryhorrorghost movie.

Hanis don't really do that.

Well, I don't watch any scaryhorrorghost Malay movies. I can watch some Thai ones, Korean, Japanese and definitely English. But not Malay or Indonesian ones. And I happen to think the reason behind my seemly odd ... choise is logical.

You see, the ghosts in Malay/Indonesian movies talk in Malay. And the probability of the real ghosts here talking in Malay or even Thai is bigger than them sprouting out words in English.


Okay, I know there are some flaws in there but it helps me. I'm utterly scared of Malay scaryhorrorghost movies. And haven't watched one in ages. I just la-di-da myself in my room with earphones on, volume up whenever Mama decides to watch some scary ones.

So moving back to the last night movie, I screamed like, twice. And Mama was confused if its me or the bro.

Mama :Who screamed?

Bro: Hanis

Hanis: I'm the only one whose eyes are not covered by a pillow or hands

My brother has the best method. Everytime the movie gets into a dodgy moment, the pillow will be covering his face. Pffft. I remember watching The Omen with two friends who insisted it to be one of the best movie of the summer.

Note, I didn't know what movie we'll be watching until we were at the ticket counter due to my mind being preoccupied by a cute guy in front of me.

Friend: Three for The Omen

Hanis: The whattt?

Ticker Seller: The Omen it is.

And I was dragged to the poster and saw the evil kid. Helllll no. But I enjoyed it, especially the photographer dude who is also Remus Lupin in the HP series so it was nice. *has a love for the older men in the HP series*

I was the one sitting in the middle. My two friends? Were the ones hiding their faces in my shoulders. I know. Woe me.

The Orphan was okay. I watched it on my friend's laptop and totally cheered on the mother when she bitched slap the little girl scary creepy woman and kicked her straight on the face at the pond.

So the reason that made me wrote this post is the cute guy in last night movie. In my opinion, he has a resemblance to Tom Felton aka Draco Malfoy. Not a striking one but still.

Take a look.

And another. This one reminds me of that Harry guy in the Spiderman movies. God, what's his name? I'm tooo lazy to google. But he's a cutie.

So I'll go and watch more scaryhorrorghost movies when there's cute guys in it.

Peace Out.

Friday, October 15, 2010

I Need a New Book. Or a Cardigan.

I realised I have some money left from the festivities and being Hanis, it means a trip to the bookstore. *hears music playing celebrating my arrival*

So I started thinking of what book should I buy. Here's a list of my recent purchases in the land of books.

1. The Time Traveller's Wife

2. The Fourth Estate

3. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

And I'm thinking of buying the second book of the Millenium trilogy. The Girl Who Played with Fire, I think. Its either that or The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest. But then I'll remember my Black Dagger Brotherhood series and how I still haven't read Vishous' and John Matthew's story.

*ask for donations to buy those books*


But anyway, I found myself googling long purple cardigan during lunch break and omg *falls in love* I'm not a clothes person and hell I don't even know if I'll look good in the cardigan. So many choices. Here's some of them :

I like the neckline of it

My friend has a black one of this and I love it

*stops posting more link*

Maybe a shopping trip with Mama would help ...


Definitely, she loves it when her daughter shows interest in shopping.


Some Wisdom In The Morning.

Good morning. Its Friday, finally. And its the 15th of October 2010. Quite a significant date for me actually.

My bitch bestie is celebrating her 8th month anni with her wonderful boyfriend.Love you with my rainbow coloured heart.Thus your child is mine to give away for favours.

Other than that, today is a day for me to celebrate my freedom and right to not be 115lbs. Its a long painful story but it has to do with No.3 or theguyIstillwishtocastrate. *takes a deep breath*

So today's post will be a short one with a nice message from Hanis. Which I'm not sure if I've posted it on here before or not.

You don't have to adjust yourself to fit into someone's definition of beauty. Its their definition that has to adjust so it fits you.

Or in a more straight to the point away

I'm gorgeous. If you can't see that, you're blind.

Peace out people. Hugh Jackman wants to tell me how utterly pretty I'am.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Box of Letters- Letter No.1

What can I say? Enjoy. Peace out.

If I can be honest, right now is the moment, right? I'm staring at the box, scared to open it. Yet I'm curious. I'm curious to read the words you wrote years ago. They must be that important for you to state in your will where the box should go. Eyeing the blue stars on
them, I finally made up my mind.

Pulling the box closer, I gave it a shake and heard tumbling about. Shake again. More tumblings about. Even more curious, I slid off the top and looked inside to see scrolls in a neat row. Each was tied up by a piece of blue ribbon. The shade of blue was familiar. Very familiar. I picked up the scroll that had the number 1 written on the edge and brought it closer to my eyes.

"I'll never use it."

"Its just a roll of ribbon,"

"Its the exact colour of your eyes."

A wave of sadness washed over me at that piece of memory. You always had an obsession over my eyes. The perfect shade of blue you once whispered into my ear in our first week together. If I'm not mistaken you finally found the ribbon in our 3rd month in. You had practically danced into the room and gave me one of those sweet kisses that searched my soul before dangling the ribbon in front of my eyes.

"Perfect match. I knew it,"

Wow. The wave came again and left a prickling in my eyes. Letting out a deep sigh, I tugged on one end of the ribbon and it felt apart, dangling from my fingers as I unrolled the scroll. I saw your handwriting in black ink and felt a shiver running down my back. Black. You always wrote in blue. Always a blue pen with a super fine tip. Never black.

"Black is too depressing for me,"

I have laughed at your reasoning before distracting you from your paper and blue pen. I ran a hand down the first letter and noted that there were no date on the top right corner. The sight of your half cursive, hard to read handwriting reminded me of the little notes you left all over the place for me to find. With a final look around the room, as if looking for your presence, I started reading the first letter.


I love you. Fuck, I still love you after the past 2 months of being a miserable shadow lurking in the corner nearby. But this will be the end of it. I swear. I saw you earlier at the party with that pretty colleague of yours. Cue your accusation that I'm stalking you. As if. Anymore.

I hate you. I can see you're trying to be the good guy in front of our friends by seeking me out and asking me how am I. Acting as if you're concern with your eyes flashing over my shoulders every 48 seconds to look at that colleague. I''ll be eternally proud of my polite manners and the sweet smile I bestowed onto you as a parting when you got dragged away.

I know you watched me at the bar with one of your frat buddies, drinking myself silly while laughing at some joke. I know you saw me dancing on the floor with another guy from work, displaying an abandon you never saw in me before. And I definitely know that you saw me leaving with my dancing partner, giggling over some shit while I put on my coat. You were waiting for your date to say her goodbyes when a mutual friend asked me about my recent hospital stay.

I saw you frowning with that look on your face when I told them it was for a fall down the stairs. My silly heart told me perhaps you still care but I was too drunk and the she-slut, I mean colleague of yours were approaching so I merely grabbed my colleague and flashed you a bitter smile.

Don't worry yourself thinking I'm trying too hard to get over you. I'm moving on and moving away next week. I got that job offer halfway around the world where there won't be anyone with eyes like yours. Peace of mind guaranteed. My body's buzzing, my guy is sleeping in the bed and my blood is relishing the alcohol after 4 months of liquor celibacy. Goodnight and I hope she doesn't turn out to be a bottled redhead fake boobs harpy. Wait, she already is. Enjoy.


P/S: You weren't all that, baby.

Deep breaths. Deep deep breaths. I remembered the bitter smile. And the drinking followed by dancing. You're right, I wondered why were you acting that way before I got distracted. I remembered how a slight flash of worried came to me when I heard about the hospital stay.

I was relieved when you moved away. But sometimes, in the dark of the night I'll get a nagging feeling that somehow, both of us had lucked out.Even after 5 years of breaking it off. Rolling the letter back, I tied the ribbon around it again, staring into the remaining scrolls and wondered if all of them were similiar.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Box of Letters- A New Project.

Due to my desire and obsession, I've now come up with an idea that evolved from a short story to a series. Or chapters one might say. Inspiration came from the obsession and something I did few months ago. But perhaps I should let you read first and tell me your thoughts. Peace out, Hanis.


They said you left me a medium sized box. By they, I mean your husband and brother. The two men showed up at my doorstep yesterday with said box in hand, the sun setting behind them as I wondered if inviting them in would go against any unknown protocols. They accepted by the way, and your husband sat on the very armchair you once favoured so much. The reading chair.

I didn't know who was the man with your brother for the first 5 minutes. All I knew that he looked broken with anguished dark eyes which kept looking at me. Your brother, a mere teen approaching the legal age was like a rock for the 15 minutes that followed those four words.

"She died last month,"

I wanted to cry out my disbelief, that this is merely a joke played on the ex boyfriend. But one look at your husband and I knew it was real. He was silent as I was told of your death. A hit and run. Have they captured the bastard I wondered. I suddenly remembered how careful you were crossing the road. Every single time. Left, right, left. Repeat. Cross. Safety.

"Her will was read last week,"

I saw a glimpse of you in your brother when he looked at me sadly, setting the box on the coffee table.It was a gift box in white with blue stars all over it. A white shoe box with blue stars all over it. I made no move to take it, confusion settling in the fog of shock. Its not every day I get mentioned in an ex girlfriend's will. Someone who I last saw 5 years ago with a bitter smile for me.

You sure know how to make me speechless I thought as I leaned back, eyes sliding from the box to the silent man on the armchair. An odd desire came to me. I wanted to tell him the significance of his seating place. Somehow I thought that one piece of info would give him a second or two worth of calm. But common sense kicked the desire away. Mourning individual shouldn't be told such facts, sense told me piously.

"What's in the box?"

I asked, pulling my gaze away from him to your only sibling. My two visitors exchanged a look before the older one cleared his throat and spoke for the first time.

"Letters she wrote when ... you were together,"


You told me once you write letters when you're going through something emotional. I suspected I might be the subject of such letters but never gave it much thought. You should have, my heart whispered to me.

20 minutes had passed since I received my visitors and now they're taking their leave, a cloud of sadness surrounding them. At the door he turned to me and once again I was struck by his eyes. Broken. Indeed he is.

"She always wanted you to read them. They were the only thing that saved her back then,"

"Saved her from what?"

My visitors left me with an unanswered question. The sky was already dark when I took a seat on the armchair and stare at the box. Looking around the room, I felt as if you were right there, watching and waiting for me to read the letters. To read words from the past.

Let's Take a Drive

I love driving. I got my license back in February 2007 and I've been driving since February 2008. What happened in the year between? I was too scared to get on the driver's seat. Like, butterflies-in-stomach, sweaty palms, "omg,I rather walk" scared. You probably be thinking how the hell did I get my license? I have no idea. Honest.

Well, I took my lessons around December 2006 after my nerve wracking exam after Mama and her friend submitted their daughters name at one of the local driving schools. I swear the moms were more excited for us to learn driving (I'm pretty sure now it has to do with making us the drivers for our younger siblings) so it was with a heavy heart, I started my lessons with the 6 hours talk on driving.

I sat near the back with my friend, reading a book while she listens. Guess who failed the multiple choice test the week after by 2 questions? Yes, me. My dad thought that was such an embaressment that he drove me over to the testing place the second time around while giving me his own lecture.

"Hanis, its all commmmmon sense. Its that easy. I don't get how you failed the first time around,"

I got 48/50 that day so it was gloat-worthy for a bit.

And perhaps waiting hours to take the test both times made me determined to pass it this time around.

Practical Part

I had a female instructor. Boy, I should have known that would be the start. One thing you must know about me is that I'm a bundle of nerves. I get panicked so easily. Put that kind of person behind the wheel of a manual car. Yes, its that bad. I'm not gonna get into it but it was bad.

My instructor was afraid that I'll fail the practical test. I was 90% sure I'll fail it due to the dreaded hill part. Did I mention my engine will die nearly everytime at a traffic light?


So on D-day, I had a mantra

If you pass, that's the last you see of manual cars.

And believe it or not, I passed.

I was shocked.

My parents were shocked.

Fast forward to February 2008, my dad got sick of me not using my license, he made me drive around for one hour. He's scary =.= I was crying when I got home. Four months later, I was driving alone.

And now? I just loveee driving. Its a stress relieving activity for me. Unless its traffic. And boy I hate the traffic here. It makes me curse. But I've never honked anyone. I count that as an accomplishment. To end this lengthy post, I'll leave with Mama's fave phrase when I'm going out with the her car.

"Don't drive so fast eh Hanis,"

Peace out.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Words For Someone.

Pick your favourite
Shade of black
You'd best
Prepare a speech
Say something funny
Say something sweet
But don't say
That you loved me.

I'm Still Breathing- Katy Perry

Its The Final Countdown

I swear that song got stuck in my head when I was 15. It was at one of those motivational talks and the person-in-charge who happened to be my tuition teacher had a "Be on time" issue. Not that I have any problems in being on time. But I think the other 99 students had a problem with being in front of the hall on time.

Not that I blame them. The two days talk was held at a country club. And the food, buffet style were tasty. Let's not mention the hot guys in the swiming pool that we can peek on from the balcony in front of the lecture hall. Or the bikini babes.

*smacks myself for a bit*

So my teacher made a rule that he'll play the song everytime after a break/meal to signal that we should start coming in. And whoever is not in their seat when the song ends, is dead. Well, I can't remember what happened to those latecomers because usually I'm person no 8 or so to be in my seat. But the purpose of this memory lane is to tell you everytime I hear the word countdown, I'll be all

"Its the final countdownnnn!!"

Cue the staring and eyebrow raising. But if you know me, you'll just think either I'm overdosing on sugar or I'm lacking sleep. Or I just had two mugs of instant coffee for my late night studying sessions.

Ooooh, talking about late night studying sessions and instant coffee, I remember last semester, around April, I was studying Actuarial Math with a friend. It was 3am and the paper? In 5 hours. And it was my 4th paper out of 5 with the 3rd paper being about 12 hours ago. So yes, I was panicking and Actuarial Math happened to be that semester "omg omg I'm gonna fail this" paper.

Around 3.15 am I was dancing around the hall with my green blanket around me, laughing at little things. My friend got scared and told me to go to sleep. I did with some half-hearted protest.

"If I fail this, I'm gonnna blame youuuu,"

I was asleep in 3 minutes.

Moral of the story? I have no idea. I'm not gonna say never do last minute studying because that will make me a hypocrite. Perhaps I should be more careful and limit my coffee intake while upping my sleeping hours.

*looks at all I've typed*

Finally, the purpose of today's post *grins before taking a sip of my apple vitagen*. In 17 days, it will be my last day of interning. 17 more days to the end of 4 months. 17 days to the end of 16 weeks.

*runs around screaming in joy*

Let's just ignore the report I have to write. And the slideshow I have to make and present. Okay, I'll do the draft for my report.

This post is also the 100th post ^^.

*takes another sip*

Here's to 100 posts and 13 followers.

Peace out.

Monday, October 11, 2010

What I Want in a Guy? I Have No Idea.

Good morning people *smiles widely*

Yes, I know its Monday morning and I'm not sulking under a stormy cloud because its the start of a week. Right now I'm listening to the radio and the topic of the breakfast show is

If you can only choose one quality in a guy, what do you want?

a) Smart
b) Sensitive
c) Charming
d) Confident
e) Funny

I heard women calling in and saying

"I want a guy with a sense of humour,"

"Confident men are the way to go,"

"He has to be smart,"

"I love charming guys,"

And Hanis here is rolling her eyes and pffft-ing at every comment. Cynical Hanis is back. I swear sometimes I feel like I have a personality problem. *thinks about it* Yeap. I'm pfft-ing from experience here.

Smart- I prefer intelligent thank you. For me, smart = book smart and so on. But I know that a smart guy can be damn ignorant. Intelligent is more ... knowledgeable. I know a guy who dropped out of college in his 2nd year and works as a gardener but he's one of the most intelligent guy I've met. He knows the on-goings of the world. He knows more than what's happening in his own country. And he has an opinion on many subjects without being arrogant. What's the use of a guy who might be some "I studied hard for this" job but who's general knowledge is minimal?

Sensitive- I don't have any problem with this. Yet.

Charming- Word of advise, if a guy seems charming and smooth with his words, just think of his experiences in being so. And some charming people are masks wearing individuals. They can be completely different behind you. I would like a slightly shy guy.

Confident- Sometimes confidence can be arrogance. A thin line between them. And sometimes confidence can rub against you the wrong way.

Funny- Well, you just have to have same sense of humour true? Might be suicidal if not.

Do not ask me what I want in a guy. I have no idea anymore. I thought wanted this and it turned out shitty. I thought I wanted that, it backfired on me. All I know is I want an open minded guy. With a taste for travel.

Peace out.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Happy Day of The Year Day

Okay, the title is lame. Crappy some might say. But I was just browsing through some stuffs when I noticed the date.


So I thought of naming the it the day of the year. Like, every year we'll have those kind of days. I remember back in 1999. There was a big event on the 9th of September. It was 9.9.99 and okay, the last of that millenia and century so it was a valid enough reason for tons of couples getting married on that day.

Wow, must have been a love/hate affair for all the wedding planners. All the money and publicity. But all the hard work. And bridezillas.

I for one thing had decided the date of my wedding. Well, the dates to avoid more like it.

1. Definitely not within 2 months of my birthday.

2. Definitely not in the same month as Valentine's Day.

Why? A teacher of mine once told me that her birthday, anniversary and teacher's day is all in May. Her husband only gave her one pressie. I was horrified at that.

Yes, I'm a gift loving whore. And I'm planning on not being cheated out of any of them when I get married. To whoever and whenever that is.

*wishes for Hugh Jackman. Or a hottie.*

Saturday, October 9, 2010

I Miss Studying.

My brother is on his computer, some online game on the screen with his history book open in front of him. He's Skyping with some friend of his. And I'm proud to be the sister of a 13 year old who's above average in his studies. *smiles proudly*

But yes, I wish I can study like him. Well, I'm not one of those "I need to be alone and silence to study" kinda person. When I was in highschool, I always had the radio on while studying. Unless I'm in my "I need to fucking memorise this" mode.

That's when I start walking around in my room like a father-to-be with my notes in my hand, muttering to myself. And yes, I talk to myself too.

"Come on Hanis. How did you not remember what you just read?Its okay Hanis. Try again."

It freaked the parents out when they heard that at midnight once.

Going to uni and with my course being 80% calculation subjects, my amazing memorising skill were not needed. But papers were needed. In those 100 sheets packets they sell at the bookstore.

*sometimes think being an actuarial science student makes her kill trees*

So most of the time when I'm studying, well after I've grasped the theory such as annuity and other things that I'm not gonna bore you guys with, I have my earphones on with my songs playing. And must I add that I sometime sing along to them?

And that when I don't get the answer by a few cents I scrunch up the paper before cursing to the deities while questioning my sanity in doing my course again. And that 10 minutes later I'll be scrambling among the paper balls to look for the one ball that had the right equations but wrong values.

I love studying. I'm saying this after 3 months and one week of interning. Watch out for my emotional profanities loaded post a few months from now when I'm in class again.

Peace Out. I'm gonna go watch Race to Witch Mountain, the new version. I remember watching the old one when I was 8. Enchanting.

Friday, October 8, 2010

Time of the Month

I think its been a while since my last depressed/sad/self pity post. But since I suffer from some depressive phase every month or so for the past *counts* 5 years, I can't help it. Not helping is that today I realised that a week from now, it would have been a year.

*allows a moment to wallow in sadness*

*wipes tear*

*flips off the ass*

To quote J.LO

I'm gonna be alright.

Here's a pretty song I've listened to in my phase

50 Things I'll Never Do-Hanis Never Believed This Is Achievable

No. 135 - List 50 things you'll never do.

Damn, this was hard but when I started, it just went on and on and on.


No 135- List 50 things you'll never do

Darn, this will be hard.

1. I'll never cut my hair for a guy.
2. I'll never tell my mom my fantasies. Ya know what I mean ;)
3. I'll never eat the white part of an Oreo with glee.
4. I'll never wear neon green
5. I'll never be mature when it comes to my ex.
6. I'll never give up the idea of castrating said ex.
7. I'll never hate chocolate.
8. I'll never be without jealousy when it comes to the brother.
9. I'll never cut off bungee jumping from my bucket list.
10. I'll never stop my love for reading.
11. I'll never stop believing I'm Mrs.Draco Malfoy.
12.I'll never support Ron-Hermione.
13. I'll never think Robert Pattison is cute. Or even good looking.
14. I'll never stop wearing deodorant.
15. I'll never believe in love at first sight.
16.I'll never give up on love, even though I say I will.
17. I'll never tell you I love you if I don't.
18. I'll never be one of those chick lits fans.
19. I'll never buy shoes over books.
20. I'll never hate jeans.
21. I'll never give up writing but writer's block is allowed.
22. I'll never stop having a thing for white boys.
23. I'll never have a thing for white chocolate.
24. I'll never like citruses scents.
25. I'll never like yellow.
26. I'll never be a typical Malay girl.
27. I'll never be at peace with my brother.
28. I'll never be at peace watching someone bully my brother.
29. I'll never think Science is the bomb.
30. I'll never be perfectly pitched.
31. I'll never get over my "I don't like strangers being physically close" thingie.
32. I'll never stop being proud of my not natural straight teeth. Thank you orthodontist.
33. I'll never get a thing for movies/dramas that I need to read the subtitles for.
34. I'll never stop checking guys' teeth out.
35. I'll never get over my thing for sharp teeth on guys.
36. I'll never deprive myself of a travelling opportunity.
37. I'll never dance the Chicken dance in public for fun.
38. I'll never like fruits that ends with "erries"
39. I'll never not be a geek in some way.
40. I'll never write poetry in Malay. Trust me.
41. I'll never not name my daughter Alexandria.
42. I'll never be a pro at eating prawns using utensils.
43. I'll never cut off all sugar from my diet without medical purposes.
44. I'll never like the Malay version of a curry- with loads of coconut milk.
45. I'll never get over my "It has scales" fear. Scales refer to those freaky things on the animal's body.
46. I'll never exchange laces for bright colours.
47. I'll never stop having book orgasms.
48. I'll never stop laughing at those self-centered FB friends.
49. I'll never choose jogging over swimming.
50. I'll never go for someone who doesn't think I'm absolutely gorgeous and wonderful, again.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Sunset in a Cup, Sunrise in a Glass.

Create a poem using Emily Dickinson's "Bring me the sunset in a cup" as a starting point.- I got this from No. 103

Bring me the sunset in a cup,
And watch me pour the beauty out,
Colouring my bedsheets,
Violent soft shades spilling everywhere,
Red climbs onto the curtains,
Orange runs along the floor,
As every other shade dances along the walls,
Hums fill the room,
Giggles echoing from the corners.
The air seems to shimmer with nature's magic,
As the sunset orchestra plays from my duvet,
A song of celebratrion,
The passing of another day,
The colours swirl and twist and slides,
All back into my cup,
Tommorow, red whisper,
Get the sunrise, orange suggested,
In a glass, the others chimed,
Oh I will,
Bring me the sunrise in a glass.

Sugar Sugar Baby

If anyone takes a look at my diet, which I mean eating habits or whatever, they'll come to the conclusion that I get my sugar mainly from my drinks. I don't really take dessert, unless its chocolate. So if its not chocolate ice-cream, chocolate cake or anything, no thank you.

Baked goods such as bread? I have a preference for the plain tasting ones. Especially the ones that most will scrunch their noses at and proclaim how tasteless the bread is. And no, I don't butter them up before eating them.

So moving to my drinks, I have to admit that I love soft drinks and chocolate drinks and tea and anything sweet. But not any more!

*is super proud*

Its been about a week since I've started but I'm drinking loads and loads of plain water and about a mug of sugarless chocolate malt drink with a dollop of fresh milk in the morning and at night. And I feel more, well my body feel lighter but I'm still getting tired so easily at night.

Think: Hanis being half dead asleep on the bed at 8pm.

Don't worry, I haven't cut off totally, I still take a bite, or lick. Everytime I see the tub of chocolate ice-cream in the freezer.

Peace out.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010


I have to admit I'm one of the people who roll their eyes at stereotyping because it gets so lame after a while. Yes, I'm Asian. No, don't even think about asking me that list of questions. Yes, I'm Muslim. Oh please don't start with anything, I get along fine with you being your religion and we all just need to live in peace. And of course, I have my own driving license and I'm studying actuarial science so I'm not missing out on life. You welcome, if I just educated you by informing what is actuarial science. And yes, I don't get abused nor am I married to an older guy due to my family forcing me to.

So I do get that you can't lump a group of people under one huge assumption. And I try to avoid mentally stereotyping someone when I meet them. Of course, there's always the

"She looks like the typical spoiled kid,"

Jock. Nerd. Dumb blonde. Asian geek. Kiasu. You name it.

Some people just look like it. Most people look like a certain stereotype in my opinion. But not all of them fulfill that expectation. I remember knowing this girl once. She looked like a tough chick. She was a daddy's girl.


It was a bit odd. But that's what I mean about defying stereotypes!

This all leads to how sometimes, I meet someone who does fulfill the stereotype and forgive me, for laughing hard in the privacy of my mind or room. There's just something about it that tickles me pink.

People are people. True?

Peace out.

Agatha Christie and Jayden Woods, Love You.

In between my interning work and my attempt at another story, I'm reading ebooks. My dad pushed me into ebooks since according to him, I can't buy every book I want to read. He said the same thing when he told me to just go borrow a book from a library.

"But then I have to give it back,"

"That's the purpose of a library,"

"But I want the book as mine ... If I can only borrow it, its less special,"

Mind you, I said this in response to his idea of waiting for the HP books to be stocked in the library instead of him buying them for me. I do read library books. Once in a while. I also borrow friends' books. And I don't feel sad in giving them back to their rightful owner. Well, some books I just want to keep and write my name all over the front of it.

HANIS. Hanis. HaNiS.hanis.hAnIs.

You get what I mean right?I like the third one by the way.

The problem with ebooks is that not all books are available, either for free downloading or for us to download at all. Most of the time, its the more ... aged books that are available. Or independent books and so. But I joined a site about two weeks ago because I wanted to read Jules Verne's Journey to the Center of the Earth.

Did I found it? Yes. Downloaded it? Yes. Read it? Until page 12. =.= Its different that a book that I can curl up with in bed and hold in my hands.

But yesterday, in a fit of boredom, I downloaded two Agatha Christie books. The Mysterious Affair at the Styles and The Secret Adversary. And I got hooked. Like, seriously hooked. Never mind that about two months ago, I read all the Wiki pages on all her books. I wanted more. More I tell you.

I know you're waiting for the bad news.

That's the only two available. I googled, searched and so on. Nope. Nothing. Does anyone know where I can download other Agatha Christie books for free? I'll give my godchild to you. Noelle, I love you with all my rainbow coloured heart.*bats eyelashes at Noelle*

Then I remembered from like, 5 years ago at my highschool's library there's a whole section full of her books. And I remembered turning my nose up at them.Bah humbug. Mysteries are boring. I weep now. I weep so badly. But since I have a 13 year old brother in that school now who has a library card.... *cackles* Oh dear brother of mine, I'll buy you a lolly.

Once that is over, I mean, my Agatha Christie dilemma, I browsed sites for interesting ebooks and I came across Jayden Woods who got a page and there were 10 short stories/ebooks available. And out of curiousity, I downloaded the first one. Then another. And another. Until I got all 10 in my cool little folder.

I love all of them. One story was released every Tuesday starting from May and yesterday, 5th October, a book was released on Amazon. I neeeed it. I have to buyyyy it. I'm on book 4 of the short stories. And I'm loving every word.

If you're interested in downloading those ebooks, do click here.

So that's my adventure in ebooks so far. Any suggestions of books or sites will be appreciated.

*leaves candies and cookies and brownies*

Peace Out.

Monday, October 4, 2010

I'll Give Up My Godchild

So yesterday while browsing Yahoo articles I saw one with a video of J.K.Rowling thus got a slight bit interested. My guess was that it must be about the upcoming Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows movie but NO. I saw the title and I swore I got a mini orgasm right there.

"J.K. Rowling might write 8th, 9th or even 10th Harry Potter book"

*hear some muffled complains on 7 being enough*

*kicks those away*

Never mind that I hated the famous '19 years later' epilogue and only read it during my first time reading it before closing the book in disgust. Harry and Ginny. EWWW. Yuck. Sorry, I'm a Harry-Hermione fan. I'm a Harmony shipper ^^

Yes, I've reread the book about 4 times, the least amount of rereads for a HP book since I gag at Hermione and Ron. And yes, I do read HP fanfics still, once in a while with hopes of a Harry Hermione ending. My brother calls me delusional but pffft.

Going back to the topic, I got so excited at even the thought of there MIGHT be more HP books. Imagine how I'll be if suddenly it comes out that it is confirmed that she will write more books.

*imagines excited screams, eye rolling from the brother, a groan from the dad at the thought of buying the rest for me*

Yes, all of my HP books were bought by my dad because most of them, well the last 4 came out near my birthday (25th July) so I totally put on a

"Please please please. I won't ask anything else for my birthday. Like ever. Well, until the next book comes out"

I usually get the book by suprise because usually my parents would be all

"Can't we wait till it get cheaper?"

"That would be 6 months away,"

"Not that long"

"Everyone would have read the book then,"

"Not everyone Hanis,"

"Fine, everyone that loves Harry Potter would have read,"


And I'll get the book on either my birthday or the day it comes out. *proud of myself*

A running joke is how long it takes me to finish reading the book the first time around. Less than a day.

So here's to the possibility of more HP books for me to read.

Idea. She should write books on the parents. Pre-HP era. Like that 500-word or something story she wrote for that auction. I love that snippet though .

Peace out.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

My Lullaby.

Since I more often than not go to bed with my earphones on, I tend to play one or two songs over and over and over. And then I'll fall asleep and when I wake up few hours later, the song will still be playing and I'll close my music player before going back to slumberland.

Currently I got two lullabies. And I just love both of them that the words are in my head already.


Someone said you had your tattoo removed
I saw you downtown singing the blues
Time to face the music
I'm no longer your muse

This is the recent one and oooh, concerning Miss Katy Perry, one must notice her latest scandal aka the Sesame Street clip and it being banned. My thought on it? Well, she could have had that mesh part of her dress be another colour but I think its more of the production fault instead of hers. They approved it and all. And its not that sexy compare to some of the things.

And my second lullaby.

You left me speechless

Yes, this one just leaves me speechless.

Peace out. Bedtime for me.


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