Thursday, November 25, 2010

Of Ambitions- I'm Still Looking!

When I was 7, I remembered being in class when the teacher asked the oh-so-expected question in her kind motherly voice (seriously, best teacher ever):

"What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Of course, the typical answers were teacher, doctor, policeman and mostly what their parents do, you know? So when it came to me, I stood up in my blue pinafore, hair in two braids tied in white ribbons, looking so damn cute and answered very politely:

"I want to be a religious teacher,"

Or more known as the Islamic Studies teacher.

I don't remember the reaction back then, but whenever I tell my friends about that noble ambition now, they'll end up laughing so hard. Mama laughed too hearing it.

I'm not religious. But my basics are strong. And even though I don't do much, I know what's wrong or right. And yes, I have a good memory when it comes to memorising so I usually get, wait, always get A's for that subject in high school.

When I turned 12, I wanted to be a doctor. I was smart. And naive. So I held onto that ambition till I was 16. What made me change my mind? Biology. The first day of studying it, I flipped through the book and closed it, my mind made up.

Goodbye doctor.

But when I was 14, I entertained a brief idea of becoming a fashion designer. I even had a book full of drawings. Let's just ignore the fact that I can't bloody sew. Its so bad that I can't even thread a needle. But there I was, daydreaming of becoming a fashion designer.

A year later, I wanted to be a radio dj. Shy quiet Hanis. Yes. I don't even have to explain.

So, after I gave up my doctor career, I flirted with so many ideas for about two years.

Engineer- I hate phsyics

Lawyer- Memorising and talking?

Nurse- Taking care, being gentle and patient? More likely I'll give them a heart attack. I don't deal well with sick people.

Singer- Don't ask.

Computer programmer- Everyone is doing that. Well, not everyone, but you get me.

Rich person- Perfect. But where to get the cash inflow?

And it went on and on and on.

Right now, I'm doing actuarial science. And if I'm blessed, I'll be an actuary one day. One day. When I secretly want to be a writer with best selling books.

Is that a proper ambition?

What about being Marky Mark's girl?

Or wait, Mrs. Draco Malfoy?

I think I can proudly say my ambition is to be Mrs. Draco Malfoy.


Peace Out.

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